Connect with us

News

‘A Third Party Has Not Settle Querrel For Us In Our Marriage Of Over 40years’ – Octogenarian

Published

on

Pa (Evang.) Emmanuel Odushu, the Ibeokosuwei (eldest man) of Furupagha clan in Odigbo Local Government Area of Ondo State, recently marked his birthday. In this interview with Info Daily in his Eku residence, Delta State, the Preacher of Church of Christ reveals the secret behind his smooth and crises-free marriage of over 4 decades. The Octogenarian also speaks on some impasse in his clan, the need for the clan and the entire Ijaw nation to speak in unison.

Excerpt

Que: Your name, sir?

Advertisement

My name is Emmanuel Odushu, I am a preacher of the Church of Christ and by God’s grace the Ibeokosuwei (eldest man) of Furupagha clan.

YOU MAY ALSO LIKE: ‘Furupagh Need Not Supremacy Tussle But Unity’ – Ibeokosuwei

Que: You marked your birthday of recent, how old are you, sir?

Advertisement

Last December 22, 2019, I marked 82 years stay on earth.

Que: How is the journey so far as an Octogenarian?

Well, I was born into a fairly comfortable family. Comfortable in the sense that my mother was averagely well to do woman, she was the one who was training me. The most unfortunate part of it however was, April 22, 1963 my father died but I still had the hope that my mother was alive, then I was in class 4 in Ondo Boys High School. So, September 30th my mother died also hence I became a full orphan within few months; my life was turned upside down. Then during that period, I thought all hope was lost. But my elder sister whom I called my mother, Binigbolo Ekpelese (popularly known as Iye) took up the challenge, she was the one who stood by me for me to able to complete my course, that is my secondary education in Ondo Boys High School in 1964. Since then Life became unpleasant; I traveled from one place to another; I sought help from my people. In 1965 I had the opportunity to write an examination, that is, police exam at Akure, that was when police was police. I was to be trained as Inspector Cadre, there after I was to go for training in abroad for nine months and back to Nigeria for another nine months training. But that period they demanded money, 30 pounds. My sister whom I call my mother was sick, she was at Ofunuama, present Edo State. Then no body to render that help because she was down with sickness. A uncle of mine had the money at that time. I approached him to render the assistance; many people even begged him to render that assistance to me but the question he called me to ask was that, if I become policeman and subsequently a big man would I bear his name, that was a set back in my life, I could not help it so I traveled to Akure. It was in my presence that those to be recruited were driven out to Lagos to attend the only police college, Ikeja, Lagos as at then. I became upset, in fact, I did not know what to do, committing some atrocities even came to my mind at then. Along the line I became more or less a wanderer; I traveled to Ibadan and later to Lagos and finally in January 1st 1967, I left Ebijaw my own town with nothing for Delta State, then it was Bendel State. I went to my uncle, K.D. Muje’s place, there I remained with him but he did not threat me the way he ought to have treated me. This was the time Gof now metamorphosed to Chevron just started operation, I would have worked there but he never gave me the room or opportunity though he was closed to the secretary of the company; just a recommendation would have secured me a job. So, I stayed with him, I became servant to his wife; I was selling for her, doing all the home) chore. From the beginning I put my trust in God, so along the line, one night, one Mr Hoark was coming to Oghara, I was writing letter for them because I was little educated. So, I was taken to Sapele at Job’s place who happens to be my uncle. That was another breakthrough for me. So, I was with Job for some time. I later went to Warri and came back, and finally, along the line I settled in Warri. I was in Warri, and being that NPA was John Holt, I worked there. As I was passing through all these unpleasant situations, for no cause they said I should go on time off, so I went. And later when I resume they said somebody has taken my place, I became annoyed to an extent that the little pay-off they offered me I rejected it. When I left there I did not know where I was going but I left. So, I was curious in so many things. Then one day, one Preacher of Church of Christ, Vincent Oritsejolomi was preaching. That day, my aim was to go there and disgrace him because we see those people as troublesome. So, I went there to ask him some questions in a way to disgrace and redicule him but to my surprise, the answers he gave bounced back on me. This is how, not too long, I became a christian. When I became a christian, I became inquisitive of many things. So, not quite long, a letter came from Ibadan that they need some young persons to be trained as preachers and that was how I left Warri without hope though the preacher gave me 3 pounds then. I went to Ibadan in 1970. I was there for two years, after which I became a preacher. While from then till date I am still a preacher.

Advertisement

Pa Emmanuel Odushu

Que: Do you mean your highest academic qualification is High School with this Queen English you speak?

YOU MAY ALSO LIKE:One Killed Scores Injured In Communal Clash In Bayelsa

No. I later did correspondence from Manchester University where I had diploma in business English with distinction. This gave room and effectiveness in my work as preacher. So, in 1980 letter came that they needed teachers. One of my friends told me I should apply. I went there to apply, that same day I was interviewed and given appointment as an English master, and I taught in the school for good four years, here in Eku, Delta State. I pulled my weight in the teaching job. I tried to learn how to write lessonnote. Diligence in my work earned me a kind of regards and respect. But a time came they planned to flush out auxillary teachers from the system, you know they called us auxillary teachers. I therefore made up my mind that I was not going to wait till they sack me, so I volunterily tender my resignation before the plan came to materialisation. This is how I left teaching job and face my preaching job squarely.

The interviewer, Joseph Ebitibi Kanjo receiving prayers for 2020 success from the Envangelist

Que: You have been married for the past four decades but your marriage still remains untact. What are/is the secret?

You see, there’s God’s guidance. I think God really guided me in making choice for life partner. If I start narrating how many girls I wanted to marry that turned me down even from my place alone, they are over 15. All came with one excuse or the other, and myself too being someone who come from averagely well-to-do family, I have my standard, so some felt Emma was to proud. So, finally I left home, my clan Furupagha without the hope of marrying. And where I was, I was just myself until my wife came my way. I did not struggle for my wife but the good relationship I had with her brothers and sisters earned her to me. And one funniest thing, the wife I am marrying, her father and my cousin, Ebaje are of the same father. My wife was so attractive that there was interior motives to take her way but her elder brother, Smart Ogoba worked with me to make sure I take her as wife because he so much loved me. So, after getting married to my wife Queen, it was as if my life was remolded. We had nothing. We started with six spring-bed which was even gifted to us by one Suliamon. Later, I became okay after marrying her. We struggled together in the sense that there’s nothing I did not do in Eku, here. Here in Eku, I learned how to carve canoe; here my wife learn how to farm, we struggled, even after bearing our children, we only managed with them. The most secretive but interesting thing is that, we have not one day querrel for third party to settle. It is only God that thought us this secret. We were in the house which was exposed to the public but they did not one day hear us exchanging words at the top of our voice. When we had little disagreement, If I talk and my wife fails to respond I know someone is coming and we will keep quiet as my wife get up to usher the person in. And that will be the end of the misunderstanding. I guess my wife thought within herself that if we querrel and somebody come to hear about it, we will be a laughing stock. When I talk in anger and she refuses to talk and I notice it, I too will become silence. Besides, my wife do not sit in the sitting room to put mouth when I have visitor or have a crucial discussion with a visitor. In fact, she will get up and leave the sittingroom immediately someone comes in. A times, I will be the one to ask her to sit with us, even with that she will not utter a word in our discussions except I ask her to contribute. I did not subject her to this but I think it is how she was brought up. This and many humble character from my wife have made God help us and we have been managing ourselves. For the past 40years I have not taken my wife to my family in order for them to settle misunderstanding for us neither has she reported me to her family for them to come and talk to me in missunderstanding.

Advertisement

What is your advice as an experienced man in marriage to young couples and those aspiring to go into marriage soon?

My advice to them is to seek for the type of person they want to marry. The time I wanted to marry my wife, I found out that the family was a lovely one, this I know due to my closeness with her brothers. I really love the family, so I decided to go to the family for negotiation and it was not a difficult something. They did the work the more for me. Smart Ogoba, Wilson Ogoba, etc were all working for me because they all love me. I was taken as a member of the family even before I married my wife. I was at home when I was told that they wanted to force her to another husband. So, one of her sister came to me to advise me to go and take her away before they give her out to another man. So, I think within myself that how do I go to Escavos, Benikrukru to be precise to take her. So, Igbẹkẹle went there and sought for her but unfortunately she was already in Warri. Later we got her at her brother’s home Smart and that one said she should go with us, and that’s how we got married. In essence to have a successful marriage, you must know at least little about your partner. I know God factor is there but you must know him/her; know at least little about the family background, know her or his people, ask questions. I actually know my wife through her family background and not her per se. I was after my wife elder sister because I was just looking inwardly to the family and not individual, but that one said she was going to school, so I went after my present wife and the family became interested. All I was looking was the family and not individual. The family is a nice and interesting to be with. My candid advice for anyone intending to marry is find out! I am not saying you should consult oracle but find out and try to study the background of the person. I made up my mind that if I marry from the Ogoba’s family I will be at home, and this is how I married from there and have peace of mind. If youths follow all these pieces of advice, all the breakups we are seeing in marriages will be minimised. Once again, I advise that let anyone aspiring to marry look very well before he or she steps in. To those who are already married, they should see themselves as one, this is what the bible says. God does not make mistake in the book of Ephesians 5 when he first address the woman. He said wife submit yourself to your husband for the husband is the head of the family. If the wife will accept that the husband is the head of the family, her head and her ruler, there will be peace in the home. Along the line if the wife submit herself I believe the husband is under bound to love her. My wife submit herself to me and I love her. When we got married, my first admission was that she is part of me, my problem becomes her problem, her problem becomes mine. No money, but peace in the home, we have it.

Pa Odushu (right) speaking while the interviewer Joseph Kanjo (left) pays rapt attention

As the Ibeokosuwei of your clan, are you satisfied with happenings over there?

It is true that I am the Ibeokosuwei (eldest man) of Furupagha clan or kingdom. Furupagha is my kingdom. Presently what I am seeing is no supposed be; I am not happy and the struggle of putting things right is what I am on till tomorrow. We do not need the supremacy tussle, what we need is unity as one family that is not large. I am working assiduously that we come together. I want my people to come and reason together because we are so few yet we her divided and scattered. Divided we fall, united we stand. I am seriously working towards unity of the clan. We do not once again need the supremacy tussle. Right from the onset, Ebijaw as be the head communities in the Ondo State axis of the clan. In the past, any case from that axis of the clan was brought to Ebijaw for settlement by Pa Muje As the head of the clan in Ondo State axis.The way we are living is not to my taste as the eldest man there. I want us to speak same one voice) and chart a course that there will be no division among us, these are my prayers.

Advertisement

 

What would you piriotise or place as priority if you are given opportunity to stay for another 50years?

YOU MAY ALSO LIKE:Dickson, Wike’s Impasse: ‘You Are Inciting Hatred, Discord Among Ijaw’, Dickson Tells Wike

Advertisement

Well, what I will do if given opportunity to stay for another 50years is to follow steps I have taken I feel are right though they may not be right to some people. I will make sure I work out the unity of my people and the Ijaw nation at large. I will want to see that we speak unison. One thing is, if I am able to put my side aright, the Ijaw nation will welcome us. Let’s not talk about 50 years, if I am given opportunity to stay for the next 10 years, I will do more. I will make sure my people are united. It is when we as a clan and as Ijaw nation unite that the deserved recognition will be given to us. My priority for the Ijaw nation is that we should be known as be in the forefront of the decision making of this nation.

Advertisement
Comments

News

Xenophobic Attacks: Oshiomhole Tells FG To Retaliate Against South African Companies In Nigeria

Published

on

By

Senator Adams Oshiomhole has called on the Federal Government to retaliate against South African businesses operating in Nigeria following the recent attacks on Nigerians in South Africa.

Speaking during plenary on Tuesday, Oshiomhole said the Federal Government should consider revoking the working license of South African owned companies such as MTN and DSTV.

He argued that Nigeria must respond firmly to what he described as persistent hostility against its citizens.

Advertisement

READ ALSO:South Africa To Investigate ‘Mystery’ Of Planeload Of Palestinians

“I am not going to shed tears. If you hit me, I hit you. I think it is appropriate in diplomacy. It is an economic struggle,” Oshiomhole said.

He argued that while some South Africans accuse Nigerians of taking their jobs, Nigerians should return home and take over employment opportunities created by major South African companies operating in the country, including MTN and DSTV.

Advertisement

When we hit back, the President of South Africa will not only talk but will also go on his knees to recognise that Nigeria cannot be intimidated.

READ ALSO:South African Ambassador Found Dead Outside Paris Hotel

We will not condone any life being lost. If a crime has been committed under the South African law they have the right to bring any such person to justice, but to kill our people as if we are helpless, we will not allow that,” Oshiomhole added.

Advertisement

DAILY POST reports that several Nigerians in South Africa have reportedly been attacked, and their businesses destroyed, in ongoing xenophobic attacks in the country.

Continue Reading

News

IGP Orders Officers Display Name Tag On Uniform, Gives Update On State Police

Published

on

By

The Inspector General of Police, IGP, Tunji Disu, has ordered all police personnel to always have their name tags on their uniforms for easy identification.

Disu disclosed that only police personnel who are undercover are exempted from displaying their name tags.

Speaking on Tuesday, Disu said: “All police officers should have their name tags. All of us on the high table have our names apart from the undercover among us so if you look at all the Commissioners of Police we have our name tags, so it’s not our standard.

Advertisement

READ ALSO:

All the Commissioners of Police are here and that is why we called this meeting, we have list of things like this that we will want to discuss with the Commissioners of Police, we have told them earlier and we will still let them know that every that happens within their area of jurisdiction falls under their control.”

On the issue of state police, the IGP said: “Since we got the signal that the Federal Government of Nigeria intend to establish State Police and since we are the federal police, we decided to take the bull by the horn and put down our own side of what we believe on how the state police should be run.

Advertisement

“A lot of things were taken into consideration, a lot of comparative analysis was done and it has been transmitted to the National Assembly.”

 

Advertisement
Continue Reading

News

Court Orders SERAP To Pay DSS Operatives N100m For Defamation

Published

on

By

The High Court of the Federal Capital Territory has ordered a non-governmental organization, the Socio-Economic Rights and Accountability Project, SERAP, to pay N100 million as damaged to two operatives of the Department of the State Services, DSS, for unjustly defaming them in some publications.

The court also ordered SERAP to tender public apologies to the defamed officers,
Sarah John and Gabriel Ogundele, in two national newspapers, two television stations and its website.

Besides, the organization was also ordered to pay the two operatives N1 million as cost of litigation and 10 percent post-judgment interest annually on the judgment sum until it’s fully liquidated.

Advertisement

Justice Yusuf Halilu of the High Court of the Federal Capital Territory gave the order on Tuesday while delivering judgment in a N5.5 billion defamation suit instituted against SERAP by the DSS operatives.

The judge found SERAP liable for unjustly defaming the two DSS operatives with allegations that they unlawfully invaded its Abuja office, harassed and intimidated its staff, in September 2024.

READ ALSO:How We Arrested Terror Suspect Who Threatened To Kill Students, Teachers In Abuja — DSS

Advertisement

In the offending publication on its website and Twitter handle, SERAP alleged that the two operatives unlawfully invaded and occupied its office with sinister motives.

The judge held that the publication was in bad taste especially from an organization established to promote transparency and accountability, as nothing in the publication was found to be truthful.

The DSS staff had listed SERAP as 1st defendant in the suit marked CV/4547/2024. SERAP’s Deputy Director, Kolawole Oluwadare, was listed as the 2nd defendant.

Advertisement

In the suit, the claimants – Sarah John and Gabriel Ogundele – accused the two defendants of making false claims that they invaded SERAP’s Abuja office on September 9, 2024..

Counsel to the DSS, Oluwagbemileke Samuel Kehinde, had while adopting his final address in the mater urged the judge to grant all the reliefs sought by his client in the interest of justice.

READ ALSO:DSS Arrests Suspected Gunrunner, Recovers 832 Rounds Of Ammunition

Advertisement

He admitted that although the names of the two claimants were not mentioned in the defamation materials, they had however established substantial circumstances that they are the ones referred to in the published defamation article by SERAP on its website.

The counsel submitted that all ingredients of defamation have been clearly established and the offending publication referred to the two officials of the secret police.

However, SERAP, through its counsel, Victoria Bassey from Tayo Oyetibo, SAN, law firm, asked the court to dismiss the suit on the ground that the two claimants did not establish that they were the ones referred to in the alleged defamation materials.

Advertisement

She said that SERAP used “DSS officials” in the alleged offending publication, adding that the two claimants must establish that they are the ones referred to before their case can succeed.

Similar arguments were canvassed by Oluwatosin Adefioye who stood for the second defendant, adding that there was no dispute in the September 9, 2024 operation of DSS in SERAP’s office.

READ ALSO:Alleged Cyberstalking: DSS Plays Video Evidence In Sowore’s Trial

Advertisement

He said that since SERAP in the publication did not name any particular person, the claimants must plead special circumstances that they were the ones referred to as the DSS officials.

Besides, he said that there is no organization by name Department of State Services in law, hence, DSS cannot claim being defamed adding that the only entity known to law is National Security Agency.

The claimants had in the suit stated that the alleged false claim by SERAP has negatively impacted on their reputation.

Advertisement

The DSS also stated, in the statement of claim, that, in line with the agency’s practice of engaging with officials of non-governmental organisations operating in the FCT to establish a relationship with their new leadership, it directed the two officials – John and Ogunleye – to visit SERAP’s office and invite them for a familiarization meeting.

The claimants added that in carrying out the directive, John and Ogunleye paid a friendly visit to SERAP’s office at 18 Bamako Street, Wuse Zone 1, Abuja on September 9 and met with one Ruth, who upon being informed about the purpose of the visit, claimed that none of SERAP’s management staff was in the country and advised that a formal letter of invitation be written by the DSS.

READ ALSO:DSS, Police Partner NCCSALW To End Terrorism, Mop Up Illegal Arms

Advertisement

John and Ogundele, who claimed that their interactions with Ruth were recorded, said before they immediately exited SERAP’s office, Ruth promised to inform her organisation’s management about the visit and volunteered a phone number – 08160537202.

They said it was surprising that, shortly after their visit, SERAP posted on its X (Twitter) handle – @SERAPNigeria – that officers of the DSS are presently unlawfully occupying its office.

The claimant added, “On the same day, the defendants also published a statement on SERAP’s website, which was widely reported by several media outfits, falsely alleging that some officers from the DSS, described as “a tall, large, dark-skinned woman” and “a slim, dark skinned man,” invaded their Abuja office and interrogated the staff of the first defendant (SERAP).

Advertisement

John and Ogundele stated that “due to the false statements published by the defendants, the DSS has been ridiculed and criticised by international agencies such as the Amnesty International and prominent members of the Nigerian society, such as Femi Falana (SAN)”.

“Due to the false statements published by the defendants, members of the public and the international community formed the opinion that the Federal Government is using the DSS to harass the defendants.”

READ ALSO:SERAP To Court: Stop CBN From ‘Implementing ‘Unlawful, Unjust ATM Fee Hike’

Advertisement

They added that the defendants’ statements caused harm to their reputation because the staff and management of the DSS have formed the opinion that the claimants did not follow orders and carried out an unsanctioned operation and are therefore, incompetent and unprofessional.

The claimants therefore prayed the court for the following reliefs: “An order directing the defendants to tender an apology to the claimants via the first defendant’s (SERAP’s) website, X (twitter) handle, two national daily newspapers (Punch and Vanguard) and two national news television stations (Arise Television and Channels Television) for falsely accusing the claimants of unlawfully invading the first defendant’s office and interrogating the first defendant’s staff.

“An order directing the defendants to pay the claimants the sum of N5 billion as damages for the libellous statements published about the claimants.

Advertisement

“Interest on the sum of N5b at the rate of 10 percent per annum from the date of judgment until the judgment sum is realised or liquidated.

“An order directing the defendants to pay the claimants the sum of N50 million as costs of this action.”

Advertisement
Continue Reading

Trending

Exit mobile version