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Enough Reasons For Husbands To Be Unfaithful

Published

3 years ago

December 18, 2022

If someone was caught having an affair, you’d think they’d make a full confession,” observed Caroline, a relationship counsellor. “You’d think they would know if they wanted to stay or leave. You’d think they’ll be able to explain why they were unfaithful and that if they promised to ‘fight’ for their marriage that their actions would match their words. However, for lots of people recovery is not so straight forward and takes far longer than they would have imagined on discovery day”.

Sadly, we’re living in an age when infidelity has never been easier to commit or harder to deal with. A basic cause is the role of the internet. There are countless websites, and apps that exist solely to facilitate easy sex along with the services of prostitutes. Not to forget the fact that men and women are much more likely to be friends today. This was something that was much rarer 30 years ago. Now the general attitude is that the husband or wife thinks it’s acceptable to stay in touch with a lover when their fling is over. They’re ‘friends’ after all.

Cheating on a wife who is pregnant or has recently given birth is one of the last remaining sexual taboos. But there are good psychological reasons behind such a destructive act. According to Caroline, when men cheat during their partner’s pregnancy or just after she’s given birth, it is a clear signal that they are uncomfortable about becoming a father. Sometimes it triggers a crisis about their own father, especially if they are frightened of becoming like him. It can also lead to feelings of entrapment and claustrophobia. Many men tell me they become frozen with fear by their new responsibilities. ‘How on earth am I going to support all these people?’ they wonder. This can be a huge issue if you hate your job and dream of escaping.

Some men are not tempted to cheat during their wife’s first pregnancy – but the second can up them over the edge. Why? Many men find fatherhood and the reality of child care such a shock that they fear the second baby will only make matters worse – only this time they’ll be pushed further down the list of their wife’s priorities. Sex, already an infrequent event because of the pressures of baby number one, will surely only become even rarer when baby number two arrives.

“It’s a biological fact that young children kill a couple’s sex life”, observes Caroline. “For the first 18 months after a baby is born, all the oxytocin – the bonding hormone – goes into the relationship between mother and child. And let’s not forget, men need sex because it is the only way it is socially acceptable for them to get close to someone. Into this mix, it’s hardly surprising that escapism of a fling is so tempting to many new fathers.

“A word of reassurance, however, couples with children are more likely to survive an affair than those without. Children force us to find a balance between satisfying individual short-term goals and considering others and the greater good.”

One fact that shouldn’t be over-looked is women’s contributory factor to the male misbehaving badly game. “Most ‘expectant’ married men feel their wives ‘leave’ the relationship first.

According to Caroline: “This was a shock for the average blamelessly monogamous woman. Lots of women become so wrapped up in their children that they neglect their husband. I’ve lost count of the men who tell me “she was too good of a mother and not a good wife. And so every time someone talks about ‘beautiful’ children, my alarm bells go off because it sounds like the children have been put on centre stage, and not just adored but idolised. Not even the most doting father will be able to cope with being a bit part in his own marriage for long.

“Many men just want to please their partner and so don’t rock the boat – even when they’re unhappy with the attention they receive from their wives.”
VANGUARD

News

Shatta Wale Bailed Burna Boy From Ghana Prison After Arrest For Smoking Weed – Captan

Published

42 minutes ago

May 28, 2026

Editor

Ghanian singer, Captan, has claimed that his former record label boss, Shatta Wale, once bailed Nigerian singer Burna Boy out of prison in Ghana after he was allegedly arrested for smoking weed.

Speaking in a recent podcast interview, Captan claimed that Shatta Wale sent him and others to free Burna Boy from police custody.

He also claimed that Shatta Wale and his group once accommodated Burna Boy when he was being hunted by some dangerous men.

Captan said, “I once bailed Burna Boy out of prison in Ghana when he was arrested for smoking weed. Shatta Wale sent me and some guys to go and free him from police custody.

“There was a time we also accommodated him when some people were after his life. We helped him settle the case.”

He added that he and Burna Boy are no longer in good terms after the Nigerian artist’s fallout with his mentor, Shatta Wale.

He, however, said he and Shatta Wale are open to reconciling with Burna Boy if he asks for it.

Watch the video here

News

Children’s Day: Chaos At Ogbe Stadium As Dozens Faint

Published

16 hours ago

May 27, 2026

Editor

Chaos erupted on Wednesday during the Children’s Day celebration as dozens of students reportedly collapsed following a stampede triggered by the use of pepper spray.

The event,
organised by the Edo State Ministry of Education at the Samuel Ogbemudia Stadium was disrupted after some male students of Ihogbe College allegedly made uncompromising advances towards female students at the venue.
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‎ A parent who identified himself as Oboh Emmanuel said, “the behaviour of those uncultured students attracted the attention of bouncers stationed at the stadium as they rebuked the male students.”
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‎Oboh said the affected students later regrouped and attacked the bouncers, leading to a confrontation within the crowded arena.

READ ALSO:Children’s Day: Edo Commits To Child Protection
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It was gathered that in the ensuing confusion, the bouncers were reported to have deployed pepper spray in an area occupied by a large number of students.
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‎Several students, particularly female students, reportedly fainted after inhaling the substance, while others sustained injuries after being stepped on during the ensuing melee.
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‎The panic was said to have spread across the stadium as students, teachers and parents scampered for safety.
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‎Many of the affected students were reportedly rushed to the Edo Specialist Hospital for medical attention.

Reacting to the incident, Chief Press Secretary to Governor Monday Okpebholo, Dr Patrick Ebojele, said the security personnel that fired the tear gas had been detained.

He said all the students, except two, that were rushed to the hospital have been discharged.

Ebojele stated that doctors wanted to observe the students till tomorrow before allowing them to go home.

“The two students are not seriously injured. Doctors want to observe them overnight. Permanent Secretary, Ministry of Education is still at the hospital. The man who used pepper spray has been detained.

“The incident did not happen the way it is being exaggerated. All modalities were put in place to ensure the children enjoyed their day.”
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News

Okpebholo Salutes Edo Muslims, Seeks Continued Support, Prayers

Published

17 hours ago

May 27, 2026

Editor

Governor Monday Okpebholo of Edo State has urged Muslims and all Nigerians to continue to pray for peace, unity and progress in the country even as they celebrate the annual Eid-al-Adha

The governor, who was represented by his deputy, Dennis Idahosa, stated this during the annual Eid-al-Adha celebration with Muslim faithfuls held at Government House in Benin City.

He reiterated his administration’s commitment to fairness, inclusivity and equal opportunities for all citizens irrespective of religion and tribe.

According to him, the present administration remains determined to building a government that reflects the diversity of Edo State, noting that competent and qualified Muslims have continued to play vital roles in his government because of their capacity, integrity and commitment to service.

“As a government, we remain committed to fairness, inclusivity and equal opportunity for every Edo citizen, irrespective of religion, ethnicity or political affiliation. This is why quality and competent Muslims are serving in key positions in our administration.”

Okpebholo appreciated the Muslim community in Edo State for their unwavering support and continuous prayers for his administration, noting that such prayers and support have contributed immensely to the peace and steady development being witnessed across the state.

He then called on all Nigerians to use the occasion of Eid-al-Adha to pray for the administration of President Bola Ahmed Tinubu, stressing that the country needs collective prayers, unity and cooperation to overcome its present economic and security challenges.

“I urge all Muslims and indeed all Nigerians to use this occasion to pray for our dear nation and for the administration of President Bola Ahmed Tinubu. Nigeria needs our collective prayers, unity and support as we strive to overcome our challenges and build a more prosperous future for all.”

In his remarks, the Chief Imam of Edo State, Abdulfatai Enabulele, applauded the governor for what he described as remarkable developmental strides recorded in less than two years in office.

The cleric commended the administration for ongoing infrastructural development and efforts geared towards improving governance in the state, but appealed to the government to revisit and complete some abandoned projects inherited from the previous administration for the benefit of the people.