News
OPINION: Absurd Wars, Absurd Lords

By Lasisi Olagunju
“Don’t fight Man,” said Lion to his Cub, but the Cub didn’t listen. The Cub went looking for Man.
He saw a Bull. “Are you Man?”
“No, I bear Man’s yoke.”
Next he saw a Horse. “Are you Man?”
“No, Man rides me.”
Then he saw someone splitting logs with wedges: a Man!
“Fight me, Man!” said the Cub.
“I will! But first, help me split this log.”
When the Cub put his paws in the crack, Man knocked out the wedge, trapping the Cub’s paws.
The Cub finally pulled Man. loose and went home with bloody paws. Lesson learnt.
The author of that story is ancient storyteller, Aesop. He is believed to have lived in ancient Greece between 620 and 564 BCE. Thousands of years, yet his wisdom endures. American writer and writing instructor, Laura Gibbs, curates and retells the stories in uncountable numbers. If you like to fight, read the above story again. It is from Aesop via Gibbs.
When you saw ‘war’ in the headline above, you probably thought I was taking a long excursion into the latest theatre of the absurd: drama starring a minister and a soldier dragging an expensive land in Abuja. No.
There was a Yoruba musician called Ayinla Omowura. He was very popular and was rich and ‘powerful’. One day in May 1980, he drove his Mercedes Benz car to a beer parlour in Abeokuta in hot pursuit of his defected band manager. The jilted big man in a big car wanted back an old motorcycle from the ex-manager. There was a push, then a shove; and a fight. A tumbler, hurled in rage, struck the strongman on the head. The rich musician died in that barroom brawl and was buried that day; his place others took in music, in his hometown, and in his home.
MORE FROM THE AUTHOR:OPINION: Kukah And A Nation Of Marabouts
Big people take big risks. Sometimes they drag all of us into their trouble. Home and abroad, tired, retired, unretired, almost all Generals, Colonels, Majors, captains and sergeants and corporals lined up behind a ramrod naval Lieutenant. The drill was scary. Think about this: What do you think would have happened to our country if any of the key actors had suffered what Omowura suffered in that moment of anger and banger? And all because of land; earth which belongs to no one. Even Elephant knows that the earth only lends space to those who walk gently upon it. Fragile Chameleon is asked why he walks gingerly. He answers: “So that the ground will not cave in.”
There is another lesson in power and contest for space, this one pure, carefully recorded history:
One hundred and sixty five years ago, Bishop Samuel Ajayi Crowther’s son, Dr. Samuel Crowther Junior, had just returned to Abeokuta from medical school in London. Abeokuta’s native doctors who thought themselves ‘physicians’ were hostile to what he brought. They said no to him practising his alien art in their sphere of influence. There was a face-off, followed by a standoff. They said their power was mightier than the power of the foreign medicine man. When iron strikes iron, one must bend. A contest of powers was agreed upon between the two sides.
Details of that war of ‘medicine’ is told by an eyewitness, Robert Campbell, in his ‘A Pilgrimage to My Motherland’ (1861); the story was reproduced a hundred years later by A. H. M. Kirk-Greene in his ‘America in the Niger Valley: A Colonization Centenary’. So, how did the battle go? Listen to Campbell:
“Time was given for preparation on both sides. In the afternoon, the regulars appeared, clothed in their most costly garments, and well provided with orishas or charms attached to all of their persons and dress. In the meantime Mr. Crowther had also prepared to receive them. A table was placed in the middle of the room, and on it a dish in which were a few drops of sulphuric acid, so placed that a slight motion of the table would cause it to flow into a mixture of chlorate of potassa and white sugar. A clock was also in the room, from which a small bird issued every hour, and announced the time by cooing. This was arranged so as to coo while they were present.
MORE FROM THE AUTHOR:OPINION: Donald Trump’s Wildfire For The Bad Men!
“Mr. Crowther then made a brief harangue, and requested them to say who would lead off in the contest. This privilege they accorded to him. The door was closed, the curtains drawn down. All waited in breathless expectation. Presently the bird (in the clock) came out, and to their astonishment cooed twelve times, and suddenly from the midst of the dish burst forth flame and a terrible explosion. The scene that followed was indescribable: one fellow rushed through the window and scampered; another in his consternation took refuge in the bedroom, under the bed, from which he was with difficulty afterwards removed.”
I took the script of that 1860 ‘drama’ to my friend, the scientist. The clock, the cock and the chemistry cocktail. What really happened? My friend said a people that cannot grasp scientific concepts becomes vulnerable to fear and superstition. Dr. Crowther simply staged a drama, essentially a controlled chemical explosion: sulphuric acid (dehydrator and acid catalyst); sugar (fuel), and potassium chlorate (oxidizer). From my friend I learnt that “the mixture reacts violently when combined, producing flame, smoke, and noise.”
MORE FROM THE AUTHOR:OPINION: Escaping From Nigeria
Crowther did not shout, boast, or brandish charms and amulets; there was no incantation. No abuse. No insults. He simply applied science; chemistry: sulphuric acid, sugar, and potassium chlorate; an elegant, potent sequence of oxidiser, fuel, and catalyst. With a clock-bird timed to coo and trigger panic, and with a well-placed chemical reaction prepared to ignite and explode, the young doctor used knowledge (not noise) to demonstrate and assert superiority.
Curses, threats and abuse are pollutants. We had more than enough last week. But enough has been said already about the Abuja land war since it unfolded last week. The raw lesson there is that real, unleavened authority easily defeats loud, raw hubris.
Central to the Abuja land drama of last week is anger and the use of language. It may be too late to bend our dry fishes. But, how do we avoid it in the next set of leaders? I end with this 170-year-old quote:
“Do all in your power to teach your children self-government. If a child is passionate, teach him by gentle and patient means to curb his temper. If he is greedy, cultivate liberality in him.
If he is selfish, promote generosity.
If he is sulky, charm him out of it,
by encouraging frank good humor…”(‘How to teach Children’ published in ‘The R. I. Schoolmaster’, Vol. 1, No. 5 JULY, 1855).
News
Migration Agency Warns Migrants Against Irregular Travel Routes
The International Organisation for Migration (IOM), in collaboration with Giving is Healing Foundation, has sensitised residents of Ayobo in Alimosho Local Government Area of Lagos State on the dangers of irregular migration and the need to embrace legal travel procedures.
Speaking during a sensitisation programme held at Megida Ifelodu Community Development Association in Ayobo, the founder of Giving is Healing Foundation, Mr. Gbolahan Ayediran, warned intending migrants against using illegal travel routes.
Ayediran said many Nigerians desire to migrate abroad in search of better opportunities but often ignore proper procedures, thereby exposing themselves to several dangers.
“Lots of people want to migrate and most of them do it in the wrong direction. The reason for the programme is for us to advise people on how they can migrate in the right way. As much as migration is their right, they should do it correctly,” he said.
READ ALSO:How Wike Rescued Me From Political Oblivion — Oshiomhole
He advised intending travellers to obtain the necessary travel documents before embarking on any journey, noting that such documents include international passports, visas, flight tickets and yellow cards, depending on the destination country.
According to him, migrants should also gather adequate information about their destination countries to enable them make informed decisions before travelling.
Ayediran further highlighted some of the dangers associated with irregular migration, including abuse, exploitation, discrimination and forced labour.
Also speaking, the Chairman of Megida Ifelodu Community Development Association, Elder Mathews Amusan, commended the organisers for enlightening members of the community on safe migration practices.
READ ALSO: He Can’t Fix His Party Let Alone Nigeria – Oshiomhole Blasts Atiku
He urged residents planning to travel abroad to always follow legal migration procedures to avoid falling victim to human trafficking and other migration-related challenges.
One of the participants, Mr. Kolawole Adenoko, said the programme enlightened him on the dangers of irregular migration and the importance of travelling through the proper channels.
He added that he would also educate his relatives and friends on the risks associated with illegal migration.
News
Shatta Wale Bailed Burna Boy From Ghana Prison After Arrest For Smoking Weed – Captan
Ghanian singer, Captan, has claimed that his former record label boss, Shatta Wale, once bailed Nigerian singer Burna Boy out of prison in Ghana after he was allegedly arrested for smoking weed.
Speaking in a recent podcast interview, Captan claimed that Shatta Wale sent him and others to free Burna Boy from police custody.
He also claimed that Shatta Wale and his group once accommodated Burna Boy when he was being hunted by some dangerous men.
READ ALSO: Wale Edun Opens Up After Sack
Captan said, “I once bailed Burna Boy out of prison in Ghana when he was arrested for smoking weed. Shatta Wale sent me and some guys to go and free him from police custody.
“There was a time we also accommodated him when some people were after his life. We helped him settle the case.”
He added that he and Burna Boy are no longer in good terms after the Nigerian artist’s fallout with his mentor, Shatta Wale.
He, however, said he and Shatta Wale are open to reconciling with Burna Boy if he asks for it.
Watch the video here
News
Children’s Day: Chaos At Ogbe Stadium As Dozens Faint
Chaos erupted on Wednesday during the Children’s Day celebration as dozens of students reportedly collapsed following a stampede triggered by the use of pepper spray.
The event,
organised by the Edo State Ministry of Education at the Samuel Ogbemudia Stadium was disrupted after some male students of Ihogbe College allegedly made uncompromising advances towards female students at the venue.
A parent who identified himself as Oboh Emmanuel said, “the behaviour of those uncultured students attracted the attention of bouncers stationed at the stadium as they rebuked the male students.”
Oboh said the affected students later regrouped and attacked the bouncers, leading to a confrontation within the crowded arena.
READ ALSO:Children’s Day: Edo Commits To Child Protection
It was gathered that in the ensuing confusion, the bouncers were reported to have deployed pepper spray in an area occupied by a large number of students.
Several students, particularly female students, reportedly fainted after inhaling the substance, while others sustained injuries after being stepped on during the ensuing melee.
The panic was said to have spread across the stadium as students, teachers and parents scampered for safety.
Many of the affected students were reportedly rushed to the Edo Specialist Hospital for medical attention.
READ ALSO: Egor LG Chair, Ogbemudia, Vice, Osawe Impeached
Reacting to the incident, Chief Press Secretary to Governor Monday Okpebholo, Dr Patrick Ebojele, said the security personnel that fired the tear gas had been detained.
He said all the students, except two, that were rushed to the hospital have been discharged.
Ebojele stated that doctors wanted to observe the students till tomorrow before allowing them to go home.
“The two students are not seriously injured. Doctors want to observe them overnight. Permanent Secretary, Ministry of Education is still at the hospital. The man who used pepper spray has been detained.
“The incident did not happen the way it is being exaggerated. All modalities were put in place to ensure the children enjoyed their day.”
-
Headline4 days ago
Woman Passes Out After Receiving 100 Strokes Of Cane
-
Headline4 days ago
JUST IN: White House Locked Down Briefly As Gunman Opens Fire At Security Checkpoint
-
News3 days ago
More Pain For Nigerians As Cooking Gas Price Increases Nationwide
-
Politics3 days ago
Two Masked Men Gun Down Politician In His Rivers State Hotel
-
Metro4 days ago
Police Reject N500m Bribe, Recover N7.8bn Illicit Drugs In Lagos
-
News3 days ago
FG Declares Two Days Public Holiday For Eid-el Kabir Celebration
-
Politics3 days ago
‘Tinubu’s Borrowing In 24 Months Surpasses 55 Years’ Debt Record’
-
Politics2 days ago
Court Clears Goodluck Jonathan To Contest 2027 Presidential Election
-
News3 days ago
OPINION: Boko Haram Comes South
-
News2 days ago
OPINION: Like Oyedokun, We Are All Decapitated