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OPINION: The Witches On Portable’s Road To Madness (1)

Published

1 year ago

February 14, 2025

Editor

Tunde Odesola

Although it is invisible, 17th Century English philosopher, physician and medical researcher John Locke described a newborn’s mind as a tabula rasa – a clean, unused slate.

Born 224 years after Locke, Sigmund Freud, a Jew and the father of psychoanalysis, while unravelling the human psyche, said the human mind is divided into three parts – the Id, Ego and Superego – each respectively consisting of the primitive, realistic and moral instincts inherent in Man.

Well, I’m no Albert Einstein poring over heaps of ceiling-high books and scratching dishevelled hair with a quill pen, but I aver, in my limited knowledge, that the mind is the most important part of human physiology. Wait, I’ll defend my assertion.

It’s true that every part of the body is important, including the pores of the skin, nails and the hairs in the nostrils. Even science agrees that if the anus clamps shut and rejects to eject the reject, the whole body suffers. I agree, too.

To describe the abstract nature of the human mind, I go to the crossroads where three footpaths meet, where the bush burns without scorching the foliage, where shoes walk without its owners, and where the rain falls without touching the ground. The human mind is the expansive incubator and monitor of brain activities.

Modern medicine is both indulgent and redemptive; it gives genitals to the transgender and life to the comatose. Modern medicine has turned the Operating Room into a workshop where parts of the human anatomy, such as the heart, kidney, liver etc, go for a price, but the human mind has no spare parts or price. Living can still have meaning when other parts of the body ail, but not when the mind ails. When the mind is messed up, living becomes meaningless.

Ruminating over the elasticity of the mind, an incident that occurred during my National Youth Service Corps days in Enugu State over three decades ago came to mind. After writing my final paper at the Abia State University, Uturu, I was too sure I would be posted to the North for youth service.

I didn’t need to pray for my wish to come to pass, I thought. But lo and behold, I was posted to neighbouring Enugu State! I was crestfallen because I was eagerly looking forward to exploring the North and learning the Hausa language and culture.

“Didn’t these NYSC people see I’m a Yoruba who schooled in the East?” I asked myself many times, reading and rereading my deployment letter to see if there was a mistake in it. Well, bí isé ò bá p’éni, énikán kìí p’ése: when you get to the place of work, you put your hand to the plough.

So, from ABSU, I headed straight up to the NYSC Orientation Camp at Awgu. After three weeks of orientation, I got a letter of deployment to Umuopu Secondary School, Umuopu, in Igbo Eze-North LGA.

The whole of Igbo Eze-North was a palm tree belt noted for superb palm wine: fresh, undiluted àjáàbalè. Umuopu was a beautiful and accommodating land whose centenarian Onyi Isi would have me sit by his side when he held court on market days. I was a VIP because I was the first ever ‘youth corper’ to accept to serve in the land.

Despite building a well-furnished ‘corpers’ lodge with a generator to boot, the pull of Aji, a neighbouring town with electricity, was irresistible. More so, Aji had a highway and a full-fledged secondary school, whereas Umuopu only had a junior school.

As their school-leaving examination approached, the students, together with the Parent-Teacher Association of Aji High School, approached me and my NYSC colleague, Johnson Umor, to move to Aji to teach since the Umuopu school had gone on holiday.

So, Johnson and I rented the top-storey apartment of the popular traditional shrink, Enwe Nwanjo, the late father of Emmanuel, a jolly good fellow. Emma, our landlord, had a beautiful wife called Emilia and a lovely daughter, Kasie. Emma was the elder brother of Florence, my friend, who lectured at the University of Nigeria, Nsukka. Florence, I learnt, had gone to rest in heaven.

In Aji, I met a black goddess named Eucharia. Her dimple was the wink of an angel; her smile – the gentle giggle of a Tesla cranking to life in mockery of fuel scarcity. Eucharia was the sister of the vice-principal. Together with her uncle, Eucharia lived on the left wing of the top floor while we, the two Corpershon, occupied the spacious three-bedroomed apartment on the right wing.

I can’t remember what woke me up in the wee hours of that fateful night. But I remember clutching a packet of Consulate cigarettes and a bottle of stout and getting on to the balcony to savour the midnight breeze and pipe to myself.

I swig my drink; I use no cup. After a couple of swigs and smoking my cigarette halfway, I remembered Eucharia. “Did she eventually go home to Nsukka for the weekend or not?” I asked myself. With unsure steps, I walked to her door.

I made a coded hoot in front of her room. No response. She must be sleeping. But the blue light in her room was on. I increased the hoot a little, mindful not to wake the whole house up. Still no response. I peeped through the keyhole and nearly suffered a heart attack.

Right there she was, my Eucharia, in bed with another man! I knocked on the door gently, but they only changed their sleeping positions, her head resting on the man’s chest, snuggly. I drew hard on my cigarette again and again and again and again. I was wearing the NYSC white T-shirt over white shorts, and the night was bitingly cold.

So, I went back into my flat, peeped into Johnson’s room and saw he had been sent on an errand by Hypnos, the Greek god of sleep. I wouldn’t have told him about Eucharia, anyway. I put on a pair of trousers, a jacket, socks and NYSC boots; it was going to be a long night, I reckoned. I got another big stout, and I returned to the balcony, smoking, drinking and pondering. Today, today, I must know who the invader was. I was prepared to stay up all night just to know who was knifing my yam with òbe èyìn.

I smoked, swigged and went back to the keyhole repeatedly. Though the room was bathed in dim blue light, I could see them. Their shapes were unmistakable on Eucharia’s narrow bed. Ha! Olopa o! I went back to the hallway to resume my night watch, smoking, swigging and wondering.

The clock ticked past 2 a.m. and headed towards 3 a.m. as the cold bit harder. “Umm, dis guy go comot today.” I wasn’t going to fight, but I was curious to know. I began to contemplate, “Who could it be?” “It must be an old working-class man”. “It must be a shameless married old man.” Thoughts swirled in my mind.

Slowly, the clock ticked past 4 a.m., and I knew the time was nigh when the thief would make a run for it. I lay in wait on the vast balcony, replenishing my drink and cigarettes.

Then, I heard a sound in the distance. I looked towards the road where the sound wafted from. The sound became a song as I made out a little crowd strolling up the road in the morning haze.

* To be continued.

Email: tundeodes2003@yahoo.com

Facebook: @Tunde Odesola

X: @Tunde_Odesola

News

Xenophobic Attacks: Oshiomhole Tells FG To Retaliate Against South African Companies In Nigeria

Published

45 minutes ago

May 5, 2026

Editor

Senator Adams Oshiomhole has called on the Federal Government to retaliate against South African businesses operating in Nigeria following the recent attacks on Nigerians in South Africa.

Speaking during plenary on Tuesday, Oshiomhole said the Federal Government should consider revoking the working license of South African owned companies such as MTN and DSTV.

He argued that Nigeria must respond firmly to what he described as persistent hostility against its citizens.

“I am not going to shed tears. If you hit me, I hit you. I think it is appropriate in diplomacy. It is an economic struggle,” Oshiomhole said.

He argued that while some South Africans accuse Nigerians of taking their jobs, Nigerians should return home and take over employment opportunities created by major South African companies operating in the country, including MTN and DSTV.

“When we hit back, the President of South Africa will not only talk but will also go on his knees to recognise that Nigeria cannot be intimidated.

“We will not condone any life being lost. If a crime has been committed under the South African law they have the right to bring any such person to justice, but to kill our people as if we are helpless, we will not allow that,” Oshiomhole added.

DAILY POST reports that several Nigerians in South Africa have reportedly been attacked, and their businesses destroyed, in ongoing xenophobic attacks in the country.

News

IGP Orders Officers Display Name Tag On Uniform, Gives Update On State Police

Published

60 minutes ago

May 5, 2026

Editor

The Inspector General of Police, IGP, Tunji Disu, has ordered all police personnel to always have their name tags on their uniforms for easy identification.

Disu disclosed that only police personnel who are undercover are exempted from displaying their name tags.

Speaking on Tuesday, Disu said: “All police officers should have their name tags. All of us on the high table have our names apart from the undercover among us so if you look at all the Commissioners of Police we have our name tags, so it’s not our standard.

News

Court Orders SERAP To Pay DSS Operatives N100m For Defamation

Published

6 hours ago

May 5, 2026

Editor

The High Court of the Federal Capital Territory has ordered a non-governmental organization, the Socio-Economic Rights and Accountability Project, SERAP, to pay N100 million as damaged to two operatives of the Department of the State Services, DSS, for unjustly defaming them in some publications.

The court also ordered SERAP to tender public apologies to the defamed officers,
Sarah John and Gabriel Ogundele, in two national newspapers, two television stations and its website.

Besides, the organization was also ordered to pay the two operatives N1 million as cost of litigation and 10 percent post-judgment interest annually on the judgment sum until it’s fully liquidated.

Justice Yusuf Halilu of the High Court of the Federal Capital Territory gave the order on Tuesday while delivering judgment in a N5.5 billion defamation suit instituted against SERAP by the DSS operatives.

The judge found SERAP liable for unjustly defaming the two DSS operatives with allegations that they unlawfully invaded its Abuja office, harassed and intimidated its staff, in September 2024.

In the offending publication on its website and Twitter handle, SERAP alleged that the two operatives unlawfully invaded and occupied its office with sinister motives.

The judge held that the publication was in bad taste especially from an organization established to promote transparency and accountability, as nothing in the publication was found to be truthful.

The DSS staff had listed SERAP as 1st defendant in the suit marked CV/4547/2024. SERAP’s Deputy Director, Kolawole Oluwadare, was listed as the 2nd defendant.

In the suit, the claimants – Sarah John and Gabriel Ogundele – accused the two defendants of making false claims that they invaded SERAP’s Abuja office on September 9, 2024..

Counsel to the DSS, Oluwagbemileke Samuel Kehinde, had while adopting his final address in the mater urged the judge to grant all the reliefs sought by his client in the interest of justice.

He admitted that although the names of the two claimants were not mentioned in the defamation materials, they had however established substantial circumstances that they are the ones referred to in the published defamation article by SERAP on its website.

The counsel submitted that all ingredients of defamation have been clearly established and the offending publication referred to the two officials of the secret police.

However, SERAP, through its counsel, Victoria Bassey from Tayo Oyetibo, SAN, law firm, asked the court to dismiss the suit on the ground that the two claimants did not establish that they were the ones referred to in the alleged defamation materials.

She said that SERAP used “DSS officials” in the alleged offending publication, adding that the two claimants must establish that they are the ones referred to before their case can succeed.

Similar arguments were canvassed by Oluwatosin Adefioye who stood for the second defendant, adding that there was no dispute in the September 9, 2024 operation of DSS in SERAP’s office.

He said that since SERAP in the publication did not name any particular person, the claimants must plead special circumstances that they were the ones referred to as the DSS officials.

Besides, he said that there is no organization by name Department of State Services in law, hence, DSS cannot claim being defamed adding that the only entity known to law is National Security Agency.

The claimants had in the suit stated that the alleged false claim by SERAP has negatively impacted on their reputation.

The DSS also stated, in the statement of claim, that, in line with the agency’s practice of engaging with officials of non-governmental organisations operating in the FCT to establish a relationship with their new leadership, it directed the two officials – John and Ogunleye – to visit SERAP’s office and invite them for a familiarization meeting.

The claimants added that in carrying out the directive, John and Ogunleye paid a friendly visit to SERAP’s office at 18 Bamako Street, Wuse Zone 1, Abuja on September 9 and met with one Ruth, who upon being informed about the purpose of the visit, claimed that none of SERAP’s management staff was in the country and advised that a formal letter of invitation be written by the DSS.

John and Ogundele, who claimed that their interactions with Ruth were recorded, said before they immediately exited SERAP’s office, Ruth promised to inform her organisation’s management about the visit and volunteered a phone number – 08160537202.

They said it was surprising that, shortly after their visit, SERAP posted on its X (Twitter) handle – @SERAPNigeria – that officers of the DSS are presently unlawfully occupying its office.

The claimant added, “On the same day, the defendants also published a statement on SERAP’s website, which was widely reported by several media outfits, falsely alleging that some officers from the DSS, described as “a tall, large, dark-skinned woman” and “a slim, dark skinned man,” invaded their Abuja office and interrogated the staff of the first defendant (SERAP).

John and Ogundele stated that “due to the false statements published by the defendants, the DSS has been ridiculed and criticised by international agencies such as the Amnesty International and prominent members of the Nigerian society, such as Femi Falana (SAN)”.

“Due to the false statements published by the defendants, members of the public and the international community formed the opinion that the Federal Government is using the DSS to harass the defendants.”

They added that the defendants’ statements caused harm to their reputation because the staff and management of the DSS have formed the opinion that the claimants did not follow orders and carried out an unsanctioned operation and are therefore, incompetent and unprofessional.

The claimants therefore prayed the court for the following reliefs: “An order directing the defendants to tender an apology to the claimants via the first defendant’s (SERAP’s) website, X (twitter) handle, two national daily newspapers (Punch and Vanguard) and two national news television stations (Arise Television and Channels Television) for falsely accusing the claimants of unlawfully invading the first defendant’s office and interrogating the first defendant’s staff.

“An order directing the defendants to pay the claimants the sum of N5 billion as damages for the libellous statements published about the claimants.

“Interest on the sum of N5b at the rate of 10 percent per annum from the date of judgment until the judgment sum is realised or liquidated.

“An order directing the defendants to pay the claimants the sum of N50 million as costs of this action.”