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The Crowning Of Shekau

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Tunde Odesola

It’s 2:30am but she lays wide awake in bed. Her disturbed mind, with the measured precision of an expert blacksmith, tongs each issue troubling her mind on the anvil and sets the hammer to work, forging shapes into metals, burnishing hope into a grave polity. I-Sha needs to quickly find an elixir to the two ailments plaguing her husband – deafness to reason and numbness to reality.

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The thoughts came pouring down her soul like snowflakes in winter – white, feathery and beautiful yet icy, bone-freezing and deadly. She gently turns on her side, pulls the succulent duvet under her chin and lolls up on the kingsize bed, glancing at her husband sitting on the chair by the lamp.

She looks at the lion she married several years ago and sadness fills her heart. In place of the lion, a cat she sees. Though still slim and suave, the bouncy confidence has departed the gait of the man she adored. Boo, as she fondly calls him, was efficient when he donned the green khaki – only needing to open his mouth, and a horde of subordinates would fall over themselves in submissive obedience to his command. But this democracy babariga is too large and too complicated for Boo to wear. With his gangly frame, he always seems lost in the billows of the parachute the agbada of democracy has turned into. In democracy, Boo seems like a whale stranded on seashore. In the military, the zombie structure masks his inadequacies.

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I-Sha: (She clears her throat) What’s going on, Your Excellency?

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Boo: Menene, I-Sha?

I-Sha: What’s going on in your government? Don’t feign ignorance, you know what I’m talking about, Your Excellency.

Boo: It’s midnight; you need to be in bed, sleeping.

I-Sha: I’m in bed. I’ll sleep when you put my mind at rest.

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Boo: Picks his teeth.

I-Sha: You see, that’s what I’m saying; it’s about 3am and you’re picking your teeth. You ate at 8pm, you’re picking your teeth at 3am! Whenever there’s an urgent issue, you pick your teeth.

Boo: I-Sha, picking my teeth is a strategy.

I-Sha: Strategy?

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Boo: Yes, and an art of war.

I-Sha: Art of war?

Boo: Haka ne! It masks the mind’s construction from the face.

I-Sha: Mind’s construction?

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Boo: Exactly!

I-Sha: So, you know the strategy and art of war, and Boko Haram has been feeding the flesh of your soldiers to the birds? You know how to mask the mind’s construction from the face, yet you can’t do anything without your rough-riding relative, Haba Kia, and the manipulative Mammon Dowrat, who have completely seized power from you.

Boo: What do you mean?

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I-Sha: Who gives commands to your service chiefs? Who gives directives to ministers and heads of government agencies? Nigerians know who they voted for, but they’re amazed how another C-i-C emerged in Kia. They also know that Mammon is the voice on the throne. The masses are utterly disappointed in you, muji na. You deceitfully kept the promise of change to their ears and shattered it to their hope.

Boo: (His phone rings, he picks it) That’s Mammon calling. He’s in my private room.

I-Sha: Mammon calling?

Boo: Yes.

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I-Sha: So?

Boo: I need to go and answer him or should I tell him to come into the bedroom?

I-Sha: (Exasperated, speaks in Hausa) Is it Mammon who should answer to you or you answer to Mammon?

Boo: This is a democracy; everyone is equal.

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He gets up and leaves the bedroom. Tears roll down I-Sha’s eyes.

Interlude
Both Dowrat and Kia greet as Boo steps into the private room.

Boo: Why is everybody shouting your name all over the place, Kia?

Kia: (Chuckling) I don’t know, Your Excellency. I must be doing something great.

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Boo: Even I-Sha won’t sleep; she’s worried. They say you and Mammon have taken over governance. Do these people know anything about devolution of power?

Dowrat: Anyone can say whatever they like. An urgent matter of state brought us here, Your Excellency. It’s the coronavirus.

Boo: Oh yes, I heard that the coronavirus is now in Lagos. What’re you doing about it?

Dowrat: That’s why we’re here.

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Boo: Good. What’re you doing?

Dowrat: We need to embark on vaccination of cows against the dreaded disease before it leaves Lagos for the North. We need about N20bn for the exercise.

Boo: Coronavirus is a very deadly disease, Mammon! Will N20bn be enough?

Kia: We’ll manage it and take N300m from the N386m earmarked for the treatment and prevention of the disease from being transmitted among humans.

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Boo: That’s ok; humans can talk, cows can’t.

Kia: When I leave here, I’m going to look for a professor of virology and appoint him as the head of government’s intervention on coronavirus initiative for cows.

Boo: Will you appoint another professor of virology to oversee the remaining N86m earmarked for human vaccination, treatment and prevention?

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Kia: The disease was discovered in Lagos, not Kaduna, Your Excellency. A primary healthcare officer will be ok for humans.

Boo: You this boy, you’re very wise. I don’t know why everybody is shouting coronavirus! coronavirus! Kenya has suspended all flights from China, South Africa has evacuated her nationals from China.

Kia: People from the North don’t travel abroad, so we don’t need to evacuate anybody.

Boo: Even Ateekoo that I defeated is advising that I suspend flights from countries affected by coronavirus. What does that one know about governance?

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Dowrat: I wonder o, Your Excellency. His former boss from the rock city has gone mute after your re-election

Boo: You’ll soon begin to hear his voice when the new policy comes on stream.

Kia: Which of the lofty policies? Is it the one seeking southern land for herdsmen? Or the one seeking to criminalise resistance to herdsmen killings?

Boo: No, it’s the bill seeking to crown Boko Haram leader, Shekau, the Shehu of Terrorism; grant amnesty to repentant Boko Haram members and allow them enjoy foreign education.

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Kia: Haa! Those bills? They will just shout and keep quiet. When they refused to allow rugga and Boko Haram was killing them, they shouted and shouted and stopped. This one also, they’ll shout and keep quiet.

Boo: I like it that the bill emanated from the senate. If it was from Azo Roc, they would’ve, by now, been burning tyres on the streets.

Kia: Don’t mind them, Your Excellency.

Boo: Have you spoken to Shekau?

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Kia: Yes. He’s very happy. Particularly, he loves the policy that seeks to enlist his members into the army. He even expressed his desire to head the joint Army with its headquarters in Sambisa.

Dowrat:Lofty as these policies are, we need to be wary of the western world; you know they like poking their noses into people’s affairs. They’ll make an issue out of the babies Boko Haram mistakenly threw into bonfires. They’ll listen to the false allegation that Boko Haram is a terrorist group that kills and rapes.

Boo: People don’t know that everything that has an advantage, has a disadvantage. Did Odion Ighalo not profit from the coronavirus outbreak in China? This is why I’m not going to worry myself banning flights, setting up quarantine centres or providing any support. What will be, wll be.

Dowrat: We should even thank God the disease was discovered in Lagos, like the Ebola case. The coronavirus would’ve been uncontrollable if it broke out in the North.

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Boo: I’ve said it; everything that has an advantage, has a disadvantage. They said I should sack service chiefs, I refused. If I had sacked them, would we be having this wonderful partnership with Boko Haram today?

I-Sha, who overheard all their conversation, looks through the door and shouts, “Takulahi!” meaning “Fear God!”

One of the men countered, “Allah ya halince ka!” meaning, “May God punish you!”, and he goes after I-Sha.

Tunde Odesola is a seasoned journalist and a columnist with the Punch newspapers

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Email: tundeodes2003@yahoo.com

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Obaseki Swears In Five New Judges

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The Edo State Governor, Mr. Godwin Obaseki, has sworn-in five judges to the bench of the Edo State High Court, urging them to do right to all cases brought before them.

Addressing the judges at the swearing-in held in Government House, Benin City, the governor said when complaints or petitions are received, it is important to take a step back and re-examine the petitions critically to make informed decisions.

“It is with delight that today I am swearing-in five additional judges to the bench of the Edo State High Court. When I came into office in 2016, one of the commitments we made was to strengthen the judiciary. This is because of its role in the democratic process. As a government, we are going to ensure that we support the judiciary.

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“Let me start with the latest reforms which is, for me, assenting to the law providing for the autonomy of the judiciary. I believe that we are one of the few states in Nigeria today that have signed the bill of the autonomy of the judiciary into law.

READ ALSO: Conservative Christians Knock Popular Nigerian Pastor Over Comment On Porn Addiction Remedy

“It is going through a learning curve but because we believe in the independence of the judiciary; we have demonstrated our commitment to wholistic reforms by enacting that law. We would work with the Chief Judge and members of the judiciary to continue fine-tuning the way and manner in which the laws are applied.

“You are all witness to the infrastructural upgrade which we have begun in the judiciary. From providing court rooms especially in Benin City to more accommodation for Judges. In the development plan we are currently designing, we have enshrined and have ensured that within the five years of implementing the new Edo State Master Plan, that the infrastructural development for the judiciary would be completed.

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“In line with the other reforms which we are undertaking in the State, we are encouraging the judicial arm of government to take advantage of the digital infrastructure that the State is currently investing in as we have built over 2,000 km fiber optic connection across the State. We now have digital infrastructure in every area where we have a High Court. Please take advantage of the investment made.

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“I thank the Chief Judge for the support he has continued to extend to the executive. I know that the swearing-in of judges that we are experiencing today have raised quite a few issues. As part of our intention to reform the entire arm of government in Edo State, when we get complaints or petitions that some of our choices will not go well to strengthen the judiciary, I believe it is important to take a step back and re-examine the petitions critically. This is what has happened in this case.

“We are currently waiting on the National Judicial Commission (NJC) to let us know the outcome of its decision on the other judges we have received petitions for and we will comply with the decision of NJC.

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“We congratulate the judges being sworn in today. They are lucky as they are likely to spend more time in the service because of the extension in the retirement age. We wish you well and hope you will always do right to all cases brought before you.

Speaking on behalf of the new Judges, Osayende Ikwuemosi Awawu, said, “We are going to do our jobs and perform our duties to the best of our ability.”

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Conservative Christians Knock Popular Nigerian Pastor Over Comment On Porn Addiction Remedy

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Popular Nigerian pastor and founder of Abel Damina Ministries International, Dr Abel Damina, has been knocked for his comment on the remedy to porn addiction.

Damina gave his submission while speaking on Comfort FM’s Righteous Invasion of Truth (RIOT) programme in Uyo in late February.

The clip of the sermon made the rounds on Thursday where the pastor was asked how a person addicted to pornography could stop and get rid of it totally.

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He advised such persons not to struggle to stop but should keep watching while listening to the word of God at the same time.

Don’t struggle to stop watching the porn. Don’t struggle at all. Just keep watching the porn. As you are watching the porn, spend more time hearing the ‘word’. If you watch porn for one hour, spend three to four hours hearing the word of God.

“Take not. Go get all my teachings on Christ. Just keep learning and learning. After a while, you will find out that your appetite for porn is dying and the appetite for the word of God is growing. Before you know it, when you see porn, you will be irritated.

“Word of God will kill that appetite completely and give you a healthy appetite. That’s what to do. Don’t try to stop. In fact, keep watching, but spend more time studying God’s word, and you will find out that before you know it, your desire for porn would be gone,” the pastor stated.

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However, this submission has been greeted by dissension, especially from conservative Christians on social media who believed that the pastor was encouraging people, mostly addicts, to sin.

A prominent pastor, Gideon Odoma of the Fortress Ministry countered Damina’s submission while labelling pornography as a perversion.

“Christains have trivialise sexcapades. The things God call iniquities, we must never call it flexing,” he said.

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The pastor who had previously slammed Damina and Apostle Suleman for supporting the Old Testament over the New Testament remarked that both of them have wrong teaching and their objective is to derail the Christians.

“The Damina and Suleman terms are wrong. It as if their only objective in life is to derail believers so they have a lot of time on their hands and they find different creative ways to say the same useless things — Your sin does not matter — they find all sorts of ways to discredit as it were,” he said.

Another prominent pastor, Chris Oyakhilome, while quoting Habakkuk chapter 2 verse 15, submitted that pornography is a sin that should be avoided completely.

He emphasised that God recognised nakedness as a feeling of shame because pornography is synonymous with prostitution as it draws from Greek’s linguistic corpus —pony—meaning prostitute.

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“The indication is that once nakedness is being made public, it is a shame when you’re not a child. As far as God is concerned, that is a shame.

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“It started from Garden of Eden when Adam and Eve ate the forbidden apple. Their eyes were open and they found that they were naked and then covered themselves with leaves and hid from God. Christians desist from it. Those who believe in Jesus should not do it,” he stressed.

Aside from Oyakhilome and Odoma, some other Christians are lending their voice to fault Damina’s sermon.

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One Rachael, who tweeted with the handle, @ab_seyi wrote, “I am fighting tears. Lord help this man, help his followers, help him not to die like this. This is sad.”

Sandra Okafor with the handle, @okaforsandra20 said, “Even the Bible said ‘flee from every appearance of evil’. You can’t want to stop doing something and still be doing it, expecting a miracle to happen because you’re reading the word of God. As one of the cessation steps for smokers, they’re advised to throw away and move away from their triggers; be it the cigarette boxes, lighters, smoking partners, and smoking environment because you gradually become what you’re constantly exposed to. So this advice is biblically and also morally wrong.

“You’re supposed to throw away all triggers that make you want to watch porn and as you do your part, you ask the Holy Spirit to empower you and deliver you from its grip. It’s normal to stumble but thank God for the mercies of God that bring us back to Him.”

Nonetheless, while endorsing the contentious claim, Pastor Oge, the lead pastor of Cicle Church said he struggled with poor addiction in the early stage of his life and despite seeing a therapist to stop the act, it continued.

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“Dr Damina’s Porn Remedy; I struggled with porn addiction in the early stages of my life and I can tell you categorically, the struggle doesn’t help.

“Saying ‘I won’t watch Porn again’, will not stop you! That’s why it’s called an addiction! I saw a therapist and the therapist said to replace the desire to watch porn with something else… Help my brain associate the porn triggers with something else,” he wrote on his X handle.

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Oge further justified Damina’s sermon saying it was the biblical way of dealing with the addiction but that the pastor didn’t convey it well.

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What Dr Damina said is the Bible’s way to deal with addictions. He just didn’t say it well.”

A Facebook user with name, Restoration Arena also said, “I think the point he is trying to make is, a believer should not struggle with sin. Instead the believer should replace struggle with living the Word and walk in the Spirit. While that is done, sin appetite will die.”

“There is nothing wrong with what he said. All these people of little understanding, why judging him?” another user, Evangelist Precious said.

Chastising them for aligning with the proposition, one Wisdom Chiezugo with the handle, @Wchiezugo stated, “You guys are defending him because it’s what you want to hear. That’s not how God works. Read the scriptures for yourselves.

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“Maybe when you bring one scripture that supports you to keep sinning and be reading the word together then I’ll engage you. In the meantime, Keep watching the porn.”

Damina is the CEO of Kingdom Life Network (KLN) – a Christian satellite TV channel.

He is also the Senior Pastor of Power City International headquartered in Uyo, Nigeria with extension campuses across the world.

He hosts the TV programme, Righteous Invasion of Truth (RIOT) on KLN as well as on other television and radio stations.

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Kenneth Imansuangbon: A Symbol of Hope In Education And Social Equality

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As Barr. Kenneth Imansuangbon celebrates his 58th birthday, his life stands as a beacon of hope and inspiration, resonating with service, dedication, and compassion.

A multifaceted figure, Imansuangbon’s roles as a legal luminary, school proprietor, and philanthropist exemplify his unwavering commitment to fostering goodwill, equity, and progress for all.

Imansuangbon’s dedication to quality education serves as a cornerstone of his illustrious career. Through the Pace Setters Group of Schools, he has cultivated an environment where education transcends mere academics, empowering students with the skills and values to shape a brighter future.

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His leadership at the institution underscores the fusion of education and culture, setting a standard for academic excellence and societal development.

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Beyond educational boundaries, Imansuangbon’s philanthropic endeavors reflect his steadfast commitment to uplifting communities, particularly the vulnerable. Known affectionately as the “Rice Man,” his annual rice distribution to the less privileged symbolizes practical assistance and support for those in need.

His philanthropy extends beyond food donations, encompassing contributions to institutions such as the University of Benin Teaching Hospital, showcasing a holistic approach to community upliftment.

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Imansuangbon’s advocacy for justice and progress echoes throughout his initiatives, particularly in his support for youth empowerment. Through initiatives like the Essay Competition, he champions the cause of Edo youths, paving the way for their success and future leadership roles within the state and beyond.

READ ALSO: Edo Guber: Imansuangbon Picks LP Nomination Forms, Gives Obaseki Quit Notice

As a gubernatorial aspirant for Edo State under the Labour Party, Imansuangbon’s vision for state development is grounded in his extensive experience, philanthropic ethos, and unwavering commitment to the common good. He envisions a future where Edo State maximizes its resources and strategic advantages to foster wealth creation and eradicate poverty, guided by innovative and focused leadership.

On this significant occasion, it is imperative to recognize and salute Barr. Kenneth Imansuangbon for his tireless advocacy in championing education, promoting social justice, and advocating for a society where equity and progress prevail.

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His journey serves as a source of inspiration, motivating us to emulate his compassion, dedication, and unwavering commitment to serving humanity.

Happy 58th birthday, Barr. Kenneth Imansuangbon! Your legacy of compassion, leadership, and service will continue to inspire and resonate with generations to come, leaving an indelible mark on the hearts and minds of all Nigerians.

Patrick Ese, writes from Benin

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