News

The Crowning Of Shekau

Published

4 years ago

March 2, 2020

Editor

Tunde Odesola

It’s 2:30am but she lays wide awake in bed. Her disturbed mind, with the measured precision of an expert blacksmith, tongs each issue troubling her mind on the anvil and sets the hammer to work, forging shapes into metals, burnishing hope into a grave polity. I-Sha needs to quickly find an elixir to the two ailments plaguing her husband – deafness to reason and numbness to reality.

The thoughts came pouring down her soul like snowflakes in winter – white, feathery and beautiful yet icy, bone-freezing and deadly. She gently turns on her side, pulls the succulent duvet under her chin and lolls up on the kingsize bed, glancing at her husband sitting on the chair by the lamp.

She looks at the lion she married several years ago and sadness fills her heart. In place of the lion, a cat she sees. Though still slim and suave, the bouncy confidence has departed the gait of the man she adored. Boo, as she fondly calls him, was efficient when he donned the green khaki – only needing to open his mouth, and a horde of subordinates would fall over themselves in submissive obedience to his command. But this democracy babariga is too large and too complicated for Boo to wear. With his gangly frame, he always seems lost in the billows of the parachute the agbada of democracy has turned into. In democracy, Boo seems like a whale stranded on seashore. In the military, the zombie structure masks his inadequacies.

I-Sha: (She clears her throat) What’s going on, Your Excellency?

Boo: Menene, I-Sha?

I-Sha: What’s going on in your government? Don’t feign ignorance, you know what I’m talking about, Your Excellency.

Boo: It’s midnight; you need to be in bed, sleeping.

I-Sha: I’m in bed. I’ll sleep when you put my mind at rest.

Boo: Picks his teeth.

I-Sha: You see, that’s what I’m saying; it’s about 3am and you’re picking your teeth. You ate at 8pm, you’re picking your teeth at 3am! Whenever there’s an urgent issue, you pick your teeth.

Boo: I-Sha, picking my teeth is a strategy.

I-Sha: Strategy?

Boo: Yes, and an art of war.

I-Sha: Art of war?

Boo: Haka ne! It masks the mind’s construction from the face.

I-Sha: Mind’s construction?

Boo: Exactly!

I-Sha: So, you know the strategy and art of war, and Boko Haram has been feeding the flesh of your soldiers to the birds? You know how to mask the mind’s construction from the face, yet you can’t do anything without your rough-riding relative, Haba Kia, and the manipulative Mammon Dowrat, who have completely seized power from you.

Boo: What do you mean?

I-Sha: Who gives commands to your service chiefs? Who gives directives to ministers and heads of government agencies? Nigerians know who they voted for, but they’re amazed how another C-i-C emerged in Kia. They also know that Mammon is the voice on the throne. The masses are utterly disappointed in you, muji na. You deceitfully kept the promise of change to their ears and shattered it to their hope.

Boo: (His phone rings, he picks it) That’s Mammon calling. He’s in my private room.

I-Sha: Mammon calling?

Boo: Yes.

I-Sha: So?

Boo: I need to go and answer him or should I tell him to come into the bedroom?

I-Sha: (Exasperated, speaks in Hausa) Is it Mammon who should answer to you or you answer to Mammon?

Boo: This is a democracy; everyone is equal.

He gets up and leaves the bedroom. Tears roll down I-Sha’s eyes.

Interlude
Both Dowrat and Kia greet as Boo steps into the private room.

Boo: Why is everybody shouting your name all over the place, Kia?

Kia: (Chuckling) I don’t know, Your Excellency. I must be doing something great.

Boo: Even I-Sha won’t sleep; she’s worried. They say you and Mammon have taken over governance. Do these people know anything about devolution of power?

Dowrat: Anyone can say whatever they like. An urgent matter of state brought us here, Your Excellency. It’s the coronavirus.

Boo: Oh yes, I heard that the coronavirus is now in Lagos. What’re you doing about it?

Dowrat: That’s why we’re here.

Boo: Good. What’re you doing?

Dowrat: We need to embark on vaccination of cows against the dreaded disease before it leaves Lagos for the North. We need about N20bn for the exercise.

Boo: Coronavirus is a very deadly disease, Mammon! Will N20bn be enough?

Kia: We’ll manage it and take N300m from the N386m earmarked for the treatment and prevention of the disease from being transmitted among humans.

Boo: That’s ok; humans can talk, cows can’t.

Kia: When I leave here, I’m going to look for a professor of virology and appoint him as the head of government’s intervention on coronavirus initiative for cows.

Boo: Will you appoint another professor of virology to oversee the remaining N86m earmarked for human vaccination, treatment and prevention?

Kia: The disease was discovered in Lagos, not Kaduna, Your Excellency. A primary healthcare officer will be ok for humans.

Boo: You this boy, you’re very wise. I don’t know why everybody is shouting coronavirus! coronavirus! Kenya has suspended all flights from China, South Africa has evacuated her nationals from China.

Kia: People from the North don’t travel abroad, so we don’t need to evacuate anybody.

Boo: Even Ateekoo that I defeated is advising that I suspend flights from countries affected by coronavirus. What does that one know about governance?

Dowrat: I wonder o, Your Excellency. His former boss from the rock city has gone mute after your re-election

Boo: You’ll soon begin to hear his voice when the new policy comes on stream.

Kia: Which of the lofty policies? Is it the one seeking southern land for herdsmen? Or the one seeking to criminalise resistance to herdsmen killings?

Boo: No, it’s the bill seeking to crown Boko Haram leader, Shekau, the Shehu of Terrorism; grant amnesty to repentant Boko Haram members and allow them enjoy foreign education.

Kia: Haa! Those bills? They will just shout and keep quiet. When they refused to allow rugga and Boko Haram was killing them, they shouted and shouted and stopped. This one also, they’ll shout and keep quiet.

Boo: I like it that the bill emanated from the senate. If it was from Azo Roc, they would’ve, by now, been burning tyres on the streets.

Kia: Don’t mind them, Your Excellency.

Boo: Have you spoken to Shekau?

Kia: Yes. He’s very happy. Particularly, he loves the policy that seeks to enlist his members into the army. He even expressed his desire to head the joint Army with its headquarters in Sambisa.

Dowrat:Lofty as these policies are, we need to be wary of the western world; you know they like poking their noses into people’s affairs. They’ll make an issue out of the babies Boko Haram mistakenly threw into bonfires. They’ll listen to the false allegation that Boko Haram is a terrorist group that kills and rapes.

Boo: People don’t know that everything that has an advantage, has a disadvantage. Did Odion Ighalo not profit from the coronavirus outbreak in China? This is why I’m not going to worry myself banning flights, setting up quarantine centres or providing any support. What will be, wll be.

Dowrat: We should even thank God the disease was discovered in Lagos, like the Ebola case. The coronavirus would’ve been uncontrollable if it broke out in the North.

Boo: I’ve said it; everything that has an advantage, has a disadvantage. They said I should sack service chiefs, I refused. If I had sacked them, would we be having this wonderful partnership with Boko Haram today?

I-Sha, who overheard all their conversation, looks through the door and shouts, “Takulahi!” meaning “Fear God!”

One of the men countered, “Allah ya halince ka!” meaning, “May God punish you!”, and he goes after I-Sha.

Tunde Odesola is a seasoned journalist and a columnist with the Punch newspapers

Email: tundeodes2003@yahoo.com

News

Mother Of Five Jailed For Forging Late Abba Kyari’s Signature

Published

7 hours ago

May 18, 2024

Editor

A mother of five, Ramat Mba, has been sentenced to one-year imprisonment by a Federal Capital Territory High Court sitting in Gwagwalada, Abuja, for her involvement in an employment scam.

Ramat who was also found guilty of forging the signature of the late Abba Kyari, the Chief of Staff to the former President, Muhammadu Buhari, was arraigned before the court by the Independent Corrupt Practices and Other Related Offences Commission on a 5-count bordering on cheating, fraud and forgery, contrary to Section 13 of the Corrupt Practices and Other Related Offences Act 2000 and Sections 320(b), 366 of the Penal Code Cap 89 laws of Northern Nigeria.

She reportedly committed the offence sometime in 2020 when she collected N4.5 million from several job seekers, promising to secure jobs for them with the ICPC and National Air Space Research and Development Agency (NASRDA).

Also, the documentary evidence tendered showed that the convict fraudulently forged the letterhead of the Office of the Chief of Staff to former President Buhari and his signature. The letter, addressed to the ICPC Chairman, was a request for the recruitment of three individuals by the commission.

However, the late CoS, in a written correspondence that was also tendered in court as an exhibit, distanced himself or his office from authorising the letter.

Commenting on the sentencing, spokesperson for the ICPC, Demola Bakare said;

“The trial judge, Justice Muhammad, in his judgment on May 9, 2024, convicted the mother of five children on counts 1, 2, 3 and 5 that border on cheating and forgery, while she was discharged on count 4 which borders on felony.

“Justice Muhammad, during the sentencing on Thursday, pronounced a six-month jail term or N100,000 option of fine on counts 1, 2 and 3 on the convict.

“The presiding judge, who stressed the status of the convict as a first-time offender and a mother, also sentenced her to one-year imprisonment or N150,000 option on fine on count 5 which borders on forgery.”

News

Police Dismiss Inspector For N29.8m Theft, Kidnapping

Published

7 hours ago

May 18, 2024

Editor

The Nigeria Police Force has dismissed one of its officers identified as Adabo Mohammed for criminal conspiracy and armed robbery, among others.

Mohammed, who was an Inspector, alongside five others was said to be a member of an armed robbery gang allegedly responsible for the stealing of N29.8 million from a victim in Gwagwalada, Federal Capital Territory.

This was disclosed by the Force Public Relations Officer, Olumuyiwa Adejobi, in a statement issued at the Force Headquarters in Abuja on Friday.

The statement, titled, ‘Police speak tough on indiscipline, misconduct,’ noted that in a move to uphold professional standards within the Force, the Inspector-General of Police, Olukayode Egbetokun, stressed the Force’s intolerance to any form of indiscipline.

The statement read partly, “In a decisive move to uphold the highest standards of professionalism and integrity within the Nigeria Police Force, the Inspector General of Police, IGP Kayode Adeolu Egbetokun, has emphasised his administration’s zero-tolerance policy towards any form of indiscipline. He stressed that the mandate of the police is to serve and protect with honour and integrity, and as such all breaches of the core values of the NPF will be met with decisive action to maintain public trust and ensure justice.

“In line with this policy, all cases reported against personnel have been creditably attended to, and justice has been done appropriately. Many of the erring officers have been sanctioned, while some cases are still at the orderly room trial level, and will soon be concluded.

“For instance, a police inspector has been dismissed from service while three others were demoted to their previous ranks following thorough investigations which confirmed their involvement in various acts of indiscipline/crime.”

Adejobi added, “One Inspector Adabo Mohammed was dismissed for the offences of criminal conspiracy, armed robbery/kidnapping, and corrupt practice. The dismissed officer, along with five others were members of an armed robbery gang responsible for the robbery of the sum of N29.8 million from a victim in Gwagwalada, FCT as well as the kidnap of one Ikechukwu Emmanuel Okafor in Tunga Manje, and the collection of ransom sum of N4.4m. The ex-officer has been charged to court accordingly.

“Similarly, the trio of Inspectors Osagie Efford, Semiu Agbekin, and Francis Ahuen, attached to the Special Tactical Squad (STS), have been demoted to their previous rank of Sergeant for the extortion of some motorists in Abuja. The trio intercepted an unregistered Mercedes Benz at Gwarinpa, Abuja, and forced the occupants to part with the total sum of N29.4m.

“The matter when reported by one Harrison Gwamnishu (#HarrisonBBi18) via the social media platform ‘X’, was taken up and properly investigated. While the monies have been returned to the complainants, the officers were subjected to orderly room trial in line with extant laws, and have been demoted.”

The FPRO noted that some senior officers have “been subjected to the Force Disciplinary Committee hearings” to “scrutinise and address allegations of misconduct against higher-ranking officers of the Force.”

He assured the public that “these measures are taken with the utmost seriousness and are integral to restoring and maintaining their trust. He re-emphasised that the NPF is dedicated to fostering a culture of accountability and respect within all ranks to ensure that police officers serve with integrity.”

News

Doctor, Nurses Detained Over Missing Placenta, Umbilical Cord

Published

7 hours ago

May 18, 2024

Editor

The Kwara State Police Command has arrested medical staff from the Government Cottage Hospital in Iloffa town, located in the Oke-Ero local government area of the state, over the missing umbilical cord and placenta of a newborn baby.

A new mum, identified as Mrs. Williams C.B.A., raised the alarm about the missing placenta and umbilical cord following the delivery of her baby last Sunday.

Subsequently, police launched an investigation.

About five suspected health workers are being detained by the General Investigation Unit of the State Criminal Investigation Department of the police command in Ilorin.

Kwara doctor and nurses detained over missing placenta and umbilical cord.

The matter was brought to the police headquarters in Ilorin for further investigation when efforts to unravel the mystery at various levels of the local government failed.

The investigation also found that it took the concerted efforts of elders from the Odo-Owa community to calm the frayed nerves of restive youths, who suspected foul play as they were about to burn down the hospital over the incident.

The Police Public Relations Officer (PPRO) of the Kwara State Police Command, Toun Ejire-Adeyemi, confirmed the development and the arrest of the suspects, saying that investigation had already commenced.

Speaking with journalists, the nursing mother of the newborn baby, who teaches the English Language in the Orofa High School, Odo-Owa, narrated her ordeal.

She said: “I got to the Cottage hospital some minutes past 1:00 pm on Sunday and told the particular nurse I met on duty that I was having contraptions. She was the one who attended to me after confirming that I was truly in labour.

“She took me into the labour room and asked me to wait because I still have more time. Not quite long after I came, when the doctor also came in. At about some minutes to 5pm the doctor asked the nurse to usher me into labour room again that he wanted to check how close the baby was.

“He then asked that a drip be fixed on me, and at about some minutes past 6:00 pm, the labour started and I delivered the baby around some minutes to 7pm.

“Three women were present, two of them are nurses while one is a Ward attendant.

“In the course of the delivery, it was one Nurse Alabi that took the delivery and Nurse Adeloye and the Ward Attendant identified as Mrs Toyin. I don’t know her surname Those were the three people present.

“Lest I forget, there are two missing items inside the nylon; the Umbilical cord and the placenta.

“Also, while they were taking the delivery, a particular woman came and said that she was supposed to be on duty that day, that she took permission that she wanted to travel that she was just returning. She was also there during the delivery which makes the number of those present to be four women in all. She was also later invited by the police.

“Later the doctor joined them. He was not fully involved. He was just coming and going. The delivery was not done in his presence.

“Nurse Alabi, who took the delivery was the one who took the Umbilical cord and the placenta and dropped them inside a nylon that has the inscription name of the hospital and then dropped the nylon inside a carton placed right beside the delivery couch.

“As soon as that was done,they cleaned the baby and myself up and Nurse Adeloye ushered me into the main ward. The baby was placed beside me and I wasn’t feeling too well.

“Not long after that,Mrs Toyin brought in my belongings from the labour room which were two bags and placed them beside the bed.

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“I didn’t ask her about the contents of the bags because I thought the nylon of the placenta and the Umbilical cord was included in one of my bags .

“Very early the following morning when I woke up I remembered the placenta, when I looked around I didn’t see any of the Nurses that attended to me , probably they have gone home.

“When I discovered that the placenta was missing, I called a particular woman, also a ward maid but not among those who took my delivery in the night shift.

“When I told her, she said ‘Haaa’ that we should go together to the labour room which we did. When we got there the nylon inside which the placenta was kept was no longer there, likewise the carton too.”

She said she raised the alarm after the doctor and nurses who delivered the baby failed to produce the placenta and umbilical cord.

“Some of their staff started telling me they’re sorry that there was a mistake. The attendant said she had thrown the placenta inside a pit but they could not find it suggesting a dog might have eaten it.

“That was When I flared up with some members of my church who were also present that it’s not possible that they just have to present the placenta.”

Mrs Williams’ father, Mr Rufus Sanya, said he suspected foul play.

“How could an umbilical cord and a placenta of a new baby be missing when we all know the implication?

“I urge the police to do a thorough investigation and unravel the mystery behind this disappearance. That is only when justice would be said to have been served and we would be at peace with ourselves,” he said.