Tunde Odesola

Accident and misfortune have no permanent abodes, though both roam aimfully about, looking to pounce. They are identical twins with different temperaments: one sprints, the other stalks. Sometimes they travel separately, sometimes hand-in-hand, depending on the havoc at hand. Swift or slow, they strike and go. The ensuing scenario, which occurred during the childhood of an acquaintance, writes in capital leatters the joint signature of accident and misfortune.

Looking for a tan, my white acquaintance traced the sun to the beach, where he lay spread-eagled. When the sun hung low and hot – nígbàtí òrùn kan àtàrí – bronzing his forehead, John Fury (not his real name) decided to wade into the ocean for a cooling baptism.

For half an hour, John dived deep into the ocean, ducking under the waves, treading the tide, enjoying the symphony of heat and water.

After he was done, John rose from the sea and walked up the beach, refreshed and satisfied. Then, from the corner of his eye, he saw the wave coming behind. It swept past swimmers and giggling fun-seekers, frothy and hurtless, until it hit his calves, which buckled and sent him tumbling over backwards onto the sand.

He blinked and tried to laugh it off as he lay on his back and watched the ebbing tide foaming and fuming back into the sea. But the laugh flickered and fizzled out like a candle in the wind.

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John couldn’t move.

From the chest down, he lay paralysed. “Medicine saved my hands,” he told me a few days ago, rubbing his hands together as if to reassure himself they were still working. But he never got up to walk again. The wheelchair became his legs. It’s now 20 years after.

Unpredictability is the nature of accident, though misfortune may holler before hauling. Either way – accident or misfortune – the tide swings for friend or foe, never rejoice in another fellow’s fall because anyone may hold the cookie in both hands, no one can predict the way it’s going to crumble.

The next time you come across the physically-challenged or cognitively-impaired, please, do know that some of them were once able-bodied like you before fate or freewill caused an accident or a misfortune, changing their lives. But whether disability is inborn or sustained, persons living with physical or mental challenges must not be despised; rather, they should be given the wings to fly. An accident or a misfortune, you or I could have been in disability shoes.

Uhmm! Most Nigerian leaders are a study in accident; most are misfortune recalibrated; the nation’s backwardness, a badge of their ruinous reign. None is blameless. On their watch, the term ‘Accidental Discharge’ became government’s pacifier for the families of innocent citizens killed guns-a-blazing by ill-equipped and frustrated security forces.

While Nigerians shouted themselves hoarse holding a national debate on the propriety of the nation’s serving and retired generals turning their subordinates into ‘maiguards’ guarding a multimillion-dollar personal land belonging to a former Chief of Naval Staff, retired Vice Admiral Awwal Zubairu Gambo, Reuters, on November 19, 2025, published a story, “UK to build new munition factories to boost warfighting readiness.” On the same day, ABC News published a story titled “UK inflation drops to 4-month low, paving way for December rate cut”, just as Associated Press went to press with “UK defence secretary warns Russia it is ready to deal with any incursions after spy ship spotted”.

Topping the list of big headlines from Germany are two stories by Reuters. The first story is “Germany set to approve $3.5 billion defence package,” the other is “Industrial Electricity Price Relief on the Way.” In France, Reuters reports, “French National Team Qualifies for 2026 World Cup,” and “Early Greek Loan Repayment Gives France Budget Relief.”

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Rummaging through news reports, using the lens of PUNCH, this is a list of some Nigerian headlines. “Kebbi school abduction happened despite intelligence report – Tinubu,” “Tension as Wike, soldiers clash over ex-naval chief’s land,” “WQC: DR Congo knock out Super Eagles,” “Govs revolt as Wike’s expulsion breaks PDP,” “Police fire teargas as PDP factions clash in Abuja,” “Trump’s comment fuelled renewed attacks by violent groups – Akume,” “45 million Nigerians practise open defecation – Minister,” “N20bn fraud: Court adjourns arraignment as ex-director fails to appear,” “Banditry: Kwara closes schools in four LGs, demands military base.”

Need we search further to see why our country is today a paraDIES? Need we look further to know why our national hoe’s blade is blunted and our earth ravaged? A Yoruba proverb had long cautioned, ‘E wo enu ile, e wo enu oko’. Talentlessness is the Number 1 requirement for public office in Nigeria. Skilllessness is Number 2.

Ex-dictator, Chief Olusegun Matthew Okikiola Aremu Obasanjo is an 88-year-old retired general, farmer, engineer, statesman, politician and author. Aremu has survived many accidents and misfortunes in his rollercoaster life. Hailed by adherents and sycophants as Ebora Owu, Obasanjo, in all his 26 years of military service, never had a reported case of ‘accidental discharge’. However, controversy has continued to overshadow his involvement in the Nigerian Civil War, particularly the surrender of Biafran forces on January 15, 1970, with many crediting Colonel Benjamin Adekunle as the architect of Biafran surrender.

But there is another Ebora in Ekiti. His name at birth is Peter Ayodele, the son of Fayose. Fayose is a former governor of Ekiti State. He’s also a failed godfather and a failed People’s Democratic Party senatorial candidate. Tall, strong and combustive, Fayose calls himself Ebora to Nje Fried Rice – the Spirit who devours Fried Rice, impliedly placing himself high and above indigenous deities fed by humans.

Ebora is a Yoruba word that means spirit, gnome, powerful entity, or extraordinary individual. Fayose’s supporters also call him Oshokomole, a name that means spirit or tough and bold character. While Obasanjo combines soldiering toughness with his Ebora-ness, Fayose embodies two spirits – Ebora To Nje Fried Rice and Oshokomale. Both leaders are similar in many respects.

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Fayose came into national prominence in 2003 when he contested, grabbed and ran with the governorship crown of Ekiti. He powered into power on the wings of widespread appeal and federal might, having endeared himself to the masses with his free water supply initiative. But joy has a slender body that breaks too soon, warns Ola Rotimi in “The Gods Are Not to blame”. Soon, a poultry venture embarked upon by Governor Fayose in Ekiti put a knife into the father-son relationship between him and Obasanjo, who was the President. Fayose fell victim to a state-orchestrated impeachment plot and fled the Government House in disguise in October 2006.

Before an 18-wheeler truck came between them, Fayose was beholden to Obasanjo, whom he saw as the custodian of his political life, his god after God. Fayose’s first term was administered in ‘Ílà-Ílo’ hell, where he was a messenger to the different gods who demanded attention, favour and servitude. One of the Ekiti gods, whom Fayose had fallen out with, was particularly close to Obasanjo. The god, old and rich, muttered, “Good riddance,” when Fayose fled the Government House, tail between legs.

That was the day Fayose drew a red line. Instead of four years, he barely spent two in office. When he returned to the country after Obasanjo left office, Fayose was bleeding in the eyes, cursing out Obasanjo, whom he said was stricken by poverty after leaving office as military head of state in 1979, adding that the Ota farmer had to be rehabilitated before he could run for the Presidency in 1999.

In February 2011, I got a text inviting me to cover the 60th birthday anniversary of former Governor Olagunsoye Oyinlola of Osun State, in Okuku. That was ‘ojo buruku, Esu gbomi mu’ day when rampaging Satan was pacified to drink water. Dignitaries like Obasanjo and a former military Head of State, General Ibrahim Babangida, were in attendance when Fayose walked into the dining room of Oyinlola, whose wife, Princess Omolola, was personally serving out food to the political heavyweights. The host, Oyinlola, who had seen Fayose greet IBB and guests, without greeting Obasanjo, went up to him and asked why he didn’t greet Obasanjo. Fayose was blunt: I won’t greet a wicked father. Not one to be caught off guard, Obasanjo cocked his gun, aimed and fired back: I won’t acknowledge any greeting from a bad child.

Thus, the cat and mouse fight continued until 2013-2014 when Fayose was planning to run for governor the second time, and needed the platform of the PDP. That was when he reached out to Obasanjo in a letter seeking forgiveness and expressing remorse.

To be continued.

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