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OPINION: Herdsmen And Crabs Swimming In Benue’s River Of Blood

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Tunde Odesola

Long before man dug a hole in every inch of the earth searching for oil, the crab had been in the business of oil drilling. The crab’s house – I mean its burrow – not its shell, is an oil rig at work.

For many Great Akokites, the most beautiful site in the University of Lagos isn’t the 13-storey Senate Building or the golden auditorium – it’s the Lagoon Front. The Lagoon Front is the wide-armed rendezvous where the vast Lagos Lagoon kisses Akoka’s scholarly shoreline, ohing and ahing as water caresses the bank…swoosh, slosh, splosh.

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By day, the Lagoon Front is home to thinkers. By night, it’s a love nest to Romeos and Juliets exploring a soft-lit Eden. I was both thinker and wanderer, often tracing the scenic curvy road past the Lagoon Front toward the vice chancellor’s lodge, feet shuffling, thoughts flowing. Great Akokites! Great!

As a student, I was a regular daytime visitor to the Lagoon Front. There, I encountered the crab in its natural habitat. Its burrows were filled with oil water, and I always wondered what the crab had to do with oil. It never occurred to me to research the phenomenon.

But the song of Adawa King, Admiral Dele Abiodun, the Juju maestro, keeps whispering to me, “Epo ti alakan won se, lati bi odun mejo, ko i t’agolo ofo lo ja si,” meaning: “The palm oil being produced by the crab since three years ago, has not filled a single tin – wasted labour.”

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Does the crab produce palm oil? I have answers now. The crab does not produce oil. Science says the claw-bearer burrows into mudflats, mangroves or brackish wetlands, where there’s a high amount of decaying organic materials like leaves, algae, or animal waste.

As these materials decompose, they release natural oils, fatty acids and hydrocarbons, forming the shiny or oily film that cloaks the crab’s burrow. Also, some crabs produce mucus-like substances to reinforce their burrows or line the walls. These secretions can reflect light and appear oily, especially when wet. Science washes oil off the burrow.

However, a morality tale in African mythology tells a story of the crab known locally as Akan or Alakan. The Akan isn’t just an armoured crawler, it’s a drunkard, a debtor, a trickster, who frequents the bar of Adaba the Dove, a brewer and merchant of enjoyment.

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Regularly, the crab crawls sideways to the dove’s bar, drinks and stands up to go. “Where’s my money?” the dove asks. “I’ll pay you when I come tomorrow,” the crab replies.

MORE FROM THE AUTHOR:[OPINION] 2027: Tinubu And The Snake

The next day, Mr Crab, carrying his pincers like armoured tanks, comes visiting, drinking and enjoying himself. Dove: “Where’s the money for the drinks?” Crab: “I’ll pay you tomorrow.” Days turn into weeks, and Akan fails to fulfil his promise. A qshouting match ensues one afternoon. Then, friends advise Akan to go and tell a debt collector — the slithering, cold-blooded Ejo the snake, whose business nomenclature is ògò – debt collecting.

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The snake agrees to help Adaba retrieve its money from Akan. So, before Akan arrives the next day to binge, the snake is already seated. After drinking, the crab gets up and heads for the door. “Hey! Where’s my money?” “I’ll give it to you tomorrow.” The dove pounces and calls on the snake to help retrieve all his money. Wahala!

No one has seen the crab run so fast. Maybe the drink was anabolic steroids to its 10 legs. But the snake followed in hot chase, with the dove flapping behind them, cooing, “Bere mu kun-kun, bere mu kun-kun,” meaning – Grab it tightly! Grab it tightly!” But the crab narrowly makes it into its burrow. And, the dove becomes even more agitated, cooing wildly, “Bere mu kun-kun, bere mu kun-kun.”

This is a tricky test for the debt-collector, who pauses outside the burrow. Eventually, the snake inches its head into the burrow slowly; there was darkness and silence, then a sharp snap – ‘pai’ – and the snake swirls back outside in severe pain, writhing on the ground without its head. The debtor decapitates the debt collector; the crab has done its worst.

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MORE FROM THE AUTHOR: OPINION: Pounding Yams On Stubborn Bald Heads

Nigeria is a crab republic. Since 1999, corruption wore a green-white-green agbada and sat in the saddle of democracy inside Aso Rock, aiding and abetting the crabs called leaders. Nigerian crabby leaders share similarities with the storied crab. Both sets are debtors, drunkards and tricksters.

Though aeons set the fabled crab and Nigeria’s crab-leaders apart, both are experts in fakery – producing fake oil, selling fake hope, and repaying kindness with evil. Nigerian crab leaders are meaner than the devil.

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Where else but in the crabholes of Nigeria do herdsmen slaughter villagers by the hundreds without a single arrest? The crab government knows the killers, but peasant lives don’t matter in the burrows, nor do they matter in Benue, the current scene of bloodshed. Herdsmen are gods. Peasants are dogs.

The serpent swallowed its tail a long time ago when Jona-Dumb looked for his shoelace while the nation burnt, and the skeletal tyrant handed over the country to herdsmen before heading to Katsina ranch. Now, the mafia lord, cigar between clenched lips, presses down his Chicago boots on the masses’ neck, toasting to his impending 2027 electoral victory. “It is my turn!”

Since Olusegun Obasanjo’s reign, herdsmen have painted Nigeria red. Yet no killer has ever worn handcuffs (except once), no machete has been brought to court. But the DSS – Department of Supression and Suffocation – is hounding the call for a shadow government.

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There is a WIKEd crab in Abuja, roaming freely and wildly – claws up, ready to fight even its own shadow. He epitomises the crab mentality that defines Nigerian politics – drag others down, cling to power, oppress the oppressed, kill and loot.

MORE FROM THE AUTHOR: OPINION: Animals In Human Skin

For security purposes, the mythical crab safeguards its carapace with its protruding eyes, “oju ni alakan fi n sori,” but the crabs lording it over Nigeria don’t give a hoot if herdsmen level a whole state since they have armed escort, armoured cars and their hands in the till.

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If you think that Nigerians don’t know that President Bola Tinubu’s visit to Benue was just a photo opportunity aka photo-op, which will not stop the next bloodbath, take a look at the photo of the mother sitting by the wounded child’s bedside in the hospital when the Secretary to the Government of the Federation, George Akume, came calling. Her stare was icy, helpless and distant as if Akume and his well-fed band never existed. The picture captures Nigerians’ regret and loss of hope in the Tinubu government.

Popular social media influencer, Martins Vincent Otse, aka VeryDarkMan, visited Yelewata and interviewed an unnamed resident in the aftermath of the pogrom. The resident said the police engaged the killers, who later used another route to enter Yelewata and massacre.

Specifically, the resident mentioned Fulani herdsmen as the perpetrators of the mass murder carried out on the rainy night. Yes, rain fell, blood flowed, and the government yawned.

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As national leader of the All Progressives Congress, I remember Tinubu disagreeing with those accusing herdsmen of being the killers of the daughter of Pa Reuben Fasoranti in 2022. Tinubu had asked, “Where are the cows?” But the police later arrested the killers, and the court sentenced them to death.

I implore Tinubu’s DSS to carry out a nationwide investigation to unravel if the herdsmen rode into Yelewata on cows. Maybe they will find some chewing cud beside the burnt corpses.

In Nigeria’s crab empire, cows roam, killer herdsmen thrive, lands abound without food, and oil wealth is meaningless. What is the name of a big-for-nothing country?

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Email: tundeodes2003@yahoo.com

Facebook: @Tunde Odesola

X: @Tunde_Odesola

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Xenophobic Attacks: Oshiomhole Tells FG To Retaliate Against South African Companies In Nigeria

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Senator Adams Oshiomhole has called on the Federal Government to retaliate against South African businesses operating in Nigeria following the recent attacks on Nigerians in South Africa.

Speaking during plenary on Tuesday, Oshiomhole said the Federal Government should consider revoking the working license of South African owned companies such as MTN and DSTV.

He argued that Nigeria must respond firmly to what he described as persistent hostility against its citizens.

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READ ALSO:South Africa To Investigate ‘Mystery’ Of Planeload Of Palestinians

“I am not going to shed tears. If you hit me, I hit you. I think it is appropriate in diplomacy. It is an economic struggle,” Oshiomhole said.

He argued that while some South Africans accuse Nigerians of taking their jobs, Nigerians should return home and take over employment opportunities created by major South African companies operating in the country, including MTN and DSTV.

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When we hit back, the President of South Africa will not only talk but will also go on his knees to recognise that Nigeria cannot be intimidated.

READ ALSO:South African Ambassador Found Dead Outside Paris Hotel

We will not condone any life being lost. If a crime has been committed under the South African law they have the right to bring any such person to justice, but to kill our people as if we are helpless, we will not allow that,” Oshiomhole added.

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DAILY POST reports that several Nigerians in South Africa have reportedly been attacked, and their businesses destroyed, in ongoing xenophobic attacks in the country.

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IGP Orders Officers Display Name Tag On Uniform, Gives Update On State Police

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The Inspector General of Police, IGP, Tunji Disu, has ordered all police personnel to always have their name tags on their uniforms for easy identification.

Disu disclosed that only police personnel who are undercover are exempted from displaying their name tags.

Speaking on Tuesday, Disu said: “All police officers should have their name tags. All of us on the high table have our names apart from the undercover among us so if you look at all the Commissioners of Police we have our name tags, so it’s not our standard.

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All the Commissioners of Police are here and that is why we called this meeting, we have list of things like this that we will want to discuss with the Commissioners of Police, we have told them earlier and we will still let them know that every that happens within their area of jurisdiction falls under their control.”

On the issue of state police, the IGP said: “Since we got the signal that the Federal Government of Nigeria intend to establish State Police and since we are the federal police, we decided to take the bull by the horn and put down our own side of what we believe on how the state police should be run.

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“A lot of things were taken into consideration, a lot of comparative analysis was done and it has been transmitted to the National Assembly.”

 

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Court Orders SERAP To Pay DSS Operatives N100m For Defamation

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The High Court of the Federal Capital Territory has ordered a non-governmental organization, the Socio-Economic Rights and Accountability Project, SERAP, to pay N100 million as damaged to two operatives of the Department of the State Services, DSS, for unjustly defaming them in some publications.

The court also ordered SERAP to tender public apologies to the defamed officers,
Sarah John and Gabriel Ogundele, in two national newspapers, two television stations and its website.

Besides, the organization was also ordered to pay the two operatives N1 million as cost of litigation and 10 percent post-judgment interest annually on the judgment sum until it’s fully liquidated.

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Justice Yusuf Halilu of the High Court of the Federal Capital Territory gave the order on Tuesday while delivering judgment in a N5.5 billion defamation suit instituted against SERAP by the DSS operatives.

The judge found SERAP liable for unjustly defaming the two DSS operatives with allegations that they unlawfully invaded its Abuja office, harassed and intimidated its staff, in September 2024.

READ ALSO:How We Arrested Terror Suspect Who Threatened To Kill Students, Teachers In Abuja — DSS

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In the offending publication on its website and Twitter handle, SERAP alleged that the two operatives unlawfully invaded and occupied its office with sinister motives.

The judge held that the publication was in bad taste especially from an organization established to promote transparency and accountability, as nothing in the publication was found to be truthful.

The DSS staff had listed SERAP as 1st defendant in the suit marked CV/4547/2024. SERAP’s Deputy Director, Kolawole Oluwadare, was listed as the 2nd defendant.

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In the suit, the claimants – Sarah John and Gabriel Ogundele – accused the two defendants of making false claims that they invaded SERAP’s Abuja office on September 9, 2024..

Counsel to the DSS, Oluwagbemileke Samuel Kehinde, had while adopting his final address in the mater urged the judge to grant all the reliefs sought by his client in the interest of justice.

READ ALSO:DSS Arrests Suspected Gunrunner, Recovers 832 Rounds Of Ammunition

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He admitted that although the names of the two claimants were not mentioned in the defamation materials, they had however established substantial circumstances that they are the ones referred to in the published defamation article by SERAP on its website.

The counsel submitted that all ingredients of defamation have been clearly established and the offending publication referred to the two officials of the secret police.

However, SERAP, through its counsel, Victoria Bassey from Tayo Oyetibo, SAN, law firm, asked the court to dismiss the suit on the ground that the two claimants did not establish that they were the ones referred to in the alleged defamation materials.

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She said that SERAP used “DSS officials” in the alleged offending publication, adding that the two claimants must establish that they are the ones referred to before their case can succeed.

Similar arguments were canvassed by Oluwatosin Adefioye who stood for the second defendant, adding that there was no dispute in the September 9, 2024 operation of DSS in SERAP’s office.

READ ALSO:Alleged Cyberstalking: DSS Plays Video Evidence In Sowore’s Trial

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He said that since SERAP in the publication did not name any particular person, the claimants must plead special circumstances that they were the ones referred to as the DSS officials.

Besides, he said that there is no organization by name Department of State Services in law, hence, DSS cannot claim being defamed adding that the only entity known to law is National Security Agency.

The claimants had in the suit stated that the alleged false claim by SERAP has negatively impacted on their reputation.

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The DSS also stated, in the statement of claim, that, in line with the agency’s practice of engaging with officials of non-governmental organisations operating in the FCT to establish a relationship with their new leadership, it directed the two officials – John and Ogunleye – to visit SERAP’s office and invite them for a familiarization meeting.

The claimants added that in carrying out the directive, John and Ogunleye paid a friendly visit to SERAP’s office at 18 Bamako Street, Wuse Zone 1, Abuja on September 9 and met with one Ruth, who upon being informed about the purpose of the visit, claimed that none of SERAP’s management staff was in the country and advised that a formal letter of invitation be written by the DSS.

READ ALSO:DSS, Police Partner NCCSALW To End Terrorism, Mop Up Illegal Arms

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John and Ogundele, who claimed that their interactions with Ruth were recorded, said before they immediately exited SERAP’s office, Ruth promised to inform her organisation’s management about the visit and volunteered a phone number – 08160537202.

They said it was surprising that, shortly after their visit, SERAP posted on its X (Twitter) handle – @SERAPNigeria – that officers of the DSS are presently unlawfully occupying its office.

The claimant added, “On the same day, the defendants also published a statement on SERAP’s website, which was widely reported by several media outfits, falsely alleging that some officers from the DSS, described as “a tall, large, dark-skinned woman” and “a slim, dark skinned man,” invaded their Abuja office and interrogated the staff of the first defendant (SERAP).

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John and Ogundele stated that “due to the false statements published by the defendants, the DSS has been ridiculed and criticised by international agencies such as the Amnesty International and prominent members of the Nigerian society, such as Femi Falana (SAN)”.

“Due to the false statements published by the defendants, members of the public and the international community formed the opinion that the Federal Government is using the DSS to harass the defendants.”

READ ALSO:SERAP To Court: Stop CBN From ‘Implementing ‘Unlawful, Unjust ATM Fee Hike’

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They added that the defendants’ statements caused harm to their reputation because the staff and management of the DSS have formed the opinion that the claimants did not follow orders and carried out an unsanctioned operation and are therefore, incompetent and unprofessional.

The claimants therefore prayed the court for the following reliefs: “An order directing the defendants to tender an apology to the claimants via the first defendant’s (SERAP’s) website, X (twitter) handle, two national daily newspapers (Punch and Vanguard) and two national news television stations (Arise Television and Channels Television) for falsely accusing the claimants of unlawfully invading the first defendant’s office and interrogating the first defendant’s staff.

“An order directing the defendants to pay the claimants the sum of N5 billion as damages for the libellous statements published about the claimants.

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“Interest on the sum of N5b at the rate of 10 percent per annum from the date of judgment until the judgment sum is realised or liquidated.

“An order directing the defendants to pay the claimants the sum of N50 million as costs of this action.”

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