News
The Crowning Of Shekau
Published
5 years agoon
By
Editor
Tunde Odesola
It’s 2:30am but she lays wide awake in bed. Her disturbed mind, with the measured precision of an expert blacksmith, tongs each issue troubling her mind on the anvil and sets the hammer to work, forging shapes into metals, burnishing hope into a grave polity. I-Sha needs to quickly find an elixir to the two ailments plaguing her husband – deafness to reason and numbness to reality.
The thoughts came pouring down her soul like snowflakes in winter – white, feathery and beautiful yet icy, bone-freezing and deadly. She gently turns on her side, pulls the succulent duvet under her chin and lolls up on the kingsize bed, glancing at her husband sitting on the chair by the lamp.
She looks at the lion she married several years ago and sadness fills her heart. In place of the lion, a cat she sees. Though still slim and suave, the bouncy confidence has departed the gait of the man she adored. Boo, as she fondly calls him, was efficient when he donned the green khaki – only needing to open his mouth, and a horde of subordinates would fall over themselves in submissive obedience to his command. But this democracy babariga is too large and too complicated for Boo to wear. With his gangly frame, he always seems lost in the billows of the parachute the agbada of democracy has turned into. In democracy, Boo seems like a whale stranded on seashore. In the military, the zombie structure masks his inadequacies.
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I-Sha: (She clears her throat) What’s going on, Your Excellency?
Boo: Menene, I-Sha?
I-Sha: What’s going on in your government? Don’t feign ignorance, you know what I’m talking about, Your Excellency.
Boo: It’s midnight; you need to be in bed, sleeping.
I-Sha: I’m in bed. I’ll sleep when you put my mind at rest.
Boo: Picks his teeth.
I-Sha: You see, that’s what I’m saying; it’s about 3am and you’re picking your teeth. You ate at 8pm, you’re picking your teeth at 3am! Whenever there’s an urgent issue, you pick your teeth.
Boo: I-Sha, picking my teeth is a strategy.
I-Sha: Strategy?
Boo: Yes, and an art of war.
I-Sha: Art of war?
Boo: Haka ne! It masks the mind’s construction from the face.
I-Sha: Mind’s construction?
Boo: Exactly!
I-Sha: So, you know the strategy and art of war, and Boko Haram has been feeding the flesh of your soldiers to the birds? You know how to mask the mind’s construction from the face, yet you can’t do anything without your rough-riding relative, Haba Kia, and the manipulative Mammon Dowrat, who have completely seized power from you.
Boo: What do you mean?
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I-Sha: Who gives commands to your service chiefs? Who gives directives to ministers and heads of government agencies? Nigerians know who they voted for, but they’re amazed how another C-i-C emerged in Kia. They also know that Mammon is the voice on the throne. The masses are utterly disappointed in you, muji na. You deceitfully kept the promise of change to their ears and shattered it to their hope.
Boo: (His phone rings, he picks it) That’s Mammon calling. He’s in my private room.
I-Sha: Mammon calling?
Boo: Yes.
I-Sha: So?
Boo: I need to go and answer him or should I tell him to come into the bedroom?
I-Sha: (Exasperated, speaks in Hausa) Is it Mammon who should answer to you or you answer to Mammon?
Boo: This is a democracy; everyone is equal.
He gets up and leaves the bedroom. Tears roll down I-Sha’s eyes.
Interlude
Both Dowrat and Kia greet as Boo steps into the private room.
Boo: Why is everybody shouting your name all over the place, Kia?
Kia: (Chuckling) I don’t know, Your Excellency. I must be doing something great.
Boo: Even I-Sha won’t sleep; she’s worried. They say you and Mammon have taken over governance. Do these people know anything about devolution of power?
Dowrat: Anyone can say whatever they like. An urgent matter of state brought us here, Your Excellency. It’s the coronavirus.
Boo: Oh yes, I heard that the coronavirus is now in Lagos. What’re you doing about it?
Dowrat: That’s why we’re here.
Boo: Good. What’re you doing?
Dowrat: We need to embark on vaccination of cows against the dreaded disease before it leaves Lagos for the North. We need about N20bn for the exercise.
Boo: Coronavirus is a very deadly disease, Mammon! Will N20bn be enough?
Kia: We’ll manage it and take N300m from the N386m earmarked for the treatment and prevention of the disease from being transmitted among humans.
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Boo: That’s ok; humans can talk, cows can’t.
Kia: When I leave here, I’m going to look for a professor of virology and appoint him as the head of government’s intervention on coronavirus initiative for cows.
Boo: Will you appoint another professor of virology to oversee the remaining N86m earmarked for human vaccination, treatment and prevention?
Kia: The disease was discovered in Lagos, not Kaduna, Your Excellency. A primary healthcare officer will be ok for humans.
Boo: You this boy, you’re very wise. I don’t know why everybody is shouting coronavirus! coronavirus! Kenya has suspended all flights from China, South Africa has evacuated her nationals from China.
Kia: People from the North don’t travel abroad, so we don’t need to evacuate anybody.
Boo: Even Ateekoo that I defeated is advising that I suspend flights from countries affected by coronavirus. What does that one know about governance?
Dowrat: I wonder o, Your Excellency. His former boss from the rock city has gone mute after your re-election
Boo: You’ll soon begin to hear his voice when the new policy comes on stream.
Kia: Which of the lofty policies? Is it the one seeking southern land for herdsmen? Or the one seeking to criminalise resistance to herdsmen killings?
Boo: No, it’s the bill seeking to crown Boko Haram leader, Shekau, the Shehu of Terrorism; grant amnesty to repentant Boko Haram members and allow them enjoy foreign education.
Kia: Haa! Those bills? They will just shout and keep quiet. When they refused to allow rugga and Boko Haram was killing them, they shouted and shouted and stopped. This one also, they’ll shout and keep quiet.
Boo: I like it that the bill emanated from the senate. If it was from Azo Roc, they would’ve, by now, been burning tyres on the streets.
Kia: Don’t mind them, Your Excellency.
Boo: Have you spoken to Shekau?
Kia: Yes. He’s very happy. Particularly, he loves the policy that seeks to enlist his members into the army. He even expressed his desire to head the joint Army with its headquarters in Sambisa.
Dowrat:Lofty as these policies are, we need to be wary of the western world; you know they like poking their noses into people’s affairs. They’ll make an issue out of the babies Boko Haram mistakenly threw into bonfires. They’ll listen to the false allegation that Boko Haram is a terrorist group that kills and rapes.
Boo: People don’t know that everything that has an advantage, has a disadvantage. Did Odion Ighalo not profit from the coronavirus outbreak in China? This is why I’m not going to worry myself banning flights, setting up quarantine centres or providing any support. What will be, wll be.
Dowrat: We should even thank God the disease was discovered in Lagos, like the Ebola case. The coronavirus would’ve been uncontrollable if it broke out in the North.
Boo: I’ve said it; everything that has an advantage, has a disadvantage. They said I should sack service chiefs, I refused. If I had sacked them, would we be having this wonderful partnership with Boko Haram today?
I-Sha, who overheard all their conversation, looks through the door and shouts, “Takulahi!” meaning “Fear God!”
One of the men countered, “Allah ya halince ka!” meaning, “May God punish you!”, and he goes after I-Sha.
Tunde Odesola is a seasoned journalist and a columnist with the Punch newspapers
Email: tundeodes2003@yahoo.com
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News
Law Firm Gives Okpebholo 7 Days To Apologise, Retract Threat To Peter Obi’s Freedom Of Movement
Published
6 hours agoon
July 23, 2025By
Editor
Alegal firm, Festus Ogun Legal (FOLEGAL), has given the Edo State Governor, Monday Okpebholo, a seven-day ultimatum to retract unconstitutional threats and tender a public apology to Mr. Peter Obi and the good people of Nigeria.
The governor had threatened that Obi “must not come to Edo without security clearance,” warning that his safety would not be guaranteed if he failed to heed the warning.
In a public statement issued through his Chief Press Secretary, Fred Itua, on July 21, 2025, Governor Okpebholo reiterated that there is a need for Obi “to notify and seek security clearance from the Governor before embarking on any public engagement within the state.”
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However, the law firm, in a letter to the governor dated July 21, titled “Threat to Mr. Peter Obi is Illegal and Unconstitutional,” and signed by Festus Ogun, Esq., Managing Partner, stated that threatening Obi not to visit Edo State without security clearance from his office is not supported by law.
The law firm cited Section 41 of the 1999 Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria (as amended) and some decided cases by various courts, which hold that a governor lacks the right or power to restrict the freedom of movement of any person without recourse to law.
The letter stated, “With respect, threatening Mr. Peter Obi not to visit Edo State without security clearance from your office is certainly not supported by law. Section 41 of the 1999 Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria (as amended) provides that every citizen of Nigeria is entitled to move freely throughout Nigeria and to reside in any part thereof, and no citizen of Nigeria shall be expelled from Nigeria or refused entry thereby or exit therefrom.
“Similarly, the Court of Appeal in Faith Okafor v Lagos State Government (2016) LPELR-41066 (CA) made it very clear that a Governor lacks the right or power to restrict the freedom of movement of any person without recourse to law.”
The law firm described as preposterous the idea that the governor would subject Obi to any form of security clearance or approval before visiting Edo State for any purpose.
“It is, in fact, a gross violation of Mr. Peter Obi’s constitutionally guaranteed right to freedom of movement,” the firm insisted.
“Considering the foregoing, we hereby respectfully request that you retract the unconstitutional threats and tender a public apology to Mr. Peter Obi and the good people of Nigeria,” the letter read.
“We are confident that this modest request will be met within 7 days of receipt of this letter. In the unlikely event that our request is not met within the timeframe, we may be compelled to institute a fundamental rights enforcement lawsuit against you, in the interest of our constitutional democracy and the rule of law.”
“We trust that you are properly advised and would act accordingly,” the letter added.
News
OPINION: Protesting Police Pensioners And Fela’s Double Wahala Melody
Published
7 hours agoon
July 23, 2025By
Editor
By Israel Adebiyi
Fela Anikulapo Kuti didn’t just sing, he bled truths. His lyrics, raw and volcanic, unwrapped the Nigerian experience in ways that no policy paper or commission report ever could. And in his classic hit “Confusion Break Bone,” he sang of a dead body caught between the indignity of abandonment and the cruelty of its mourners—betrayed in life and dishonored in death.
This week, that metaphor leapt out of vinyl and echoed in real life: Retired police officers, drenched in the Abuja rain, stood like withered monuments at the gates of Nigeria’s National Assembly. Their uniforms are long gone, their batons traded for placards, and their obedience—once unquestioning—now curdled into a desperate defiance.
These are the same men who once obeyed the “last order,” whether it was to disperse protesting students, to break up industrial actions, or to quell dissent with shields and tear gas. They were Nigeria’s iron fist. They bore the insults, the bullets, the loneliness. They were denied the right to strike, to unionize, or to say no. Now they are in the same trenches as those they once confronted.
And what a sight it was.
Elderly men—some stooped, others on walking sticks—stood in the rain with sagging clothes and heavier hearts. Their chant was not angry; it was haunting. Remove us from the contributory pension scheme, they cried. We are tired of dying poor. The Contributory Pension Scheme, a policy built with the pretense of reform, has become a gaping wound that bleeds out whatever dignity retirement is supposed to offer.
Retired Chief Superintendent Manir Lawal, 67, spoke with a quiver in his voice:
“We served this country faithfully. We deserve to retire in dignity. This scheme has impoverished us. It is our right to demand better.”
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But what is dignity in a country where old age is a curse? Where retirees slump and die in biometric verification queues? Where pensions are delayed like unwanted handouts, and where death is often the only exit from poverty?
This is not just the police story. This is the Nigerian worker’s tragedy. The nurse who gave 35 years to a state hospital only to beg for her gratuity. The teacher who moulded generations but now eats once a day. The civil servant who used to process others’ salaries and now doesn’t receive his.
Nigeria, it appears, is a nation that celebrates you while you bleed and forgets you once you collapse.
These retired officers are the faces of a broken promise. The very system they upheld has turned against them. The guns they once bore are silent now. And no sirens accompany them as they sleep on floors in the rain outside the so-called hallowed chambers of power.
Why does Nigeria treat its labour force like chewing sticks—use, discard, forget?
The Monday protest wasn’t just a cry for pensions. It was a funeral for faith in the system. It was a statement that even uniforms do not shield one from poverty. That after the medals are given and the rifles turned in, hunger becomes your new commanding officer.
We must ask the hard questions: Why are those who dedicated their productive years to protecting the country begging for bread? Why must every retiree become a lobbyist for their own entitlements? Why does justice retire the moment service ends?
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But even this heartbreak is not equal-opportunity.
While the average Nigerian retiree fades into the background of national neglect, the political elite write golden exits for themselves. In many states, governors—some of whom could barely pay salaries during their tenure—have enshrined laws that guarantee themselves lifetime pensions, fleet of cars, luxury homes in multiple cities, foreign medical trips, and even security details paid for by the state.
A retired civil servant gets a verification form.
A retired governor gets a diplomatic passport.
A retired police officer gets rain.
A former senator gets a seat at the next constitutional review committee.
The contrasts are obscene.
It gets worse. These looters of public legacy do not just walk away with the treasury keys—they pass the code to their children. Nigeria has become a democracy of dynasties. Fathers rig the system. Sons inherit it.
So, when the ruling class clinks glasses in Abuja over another fuel subsidy cut, or celebrates “pension reforms” that deepen inequality, who really weeps for the rain-soaked old men at the gate? Certainly not the elite who now fly private jets to Dubai, London, France and other choice locations, for annual medicals. Not the lawmakers who collect severance packages in millions after just four years of sitting pretty in power.
The average Nigerian worker retires into penury. The ruling class retires into paradise.
The old men in uniform have served their time. The question is: when will the country serve them back?
Even the police—agents of state repression in the eyes of many—are waking up to the betrayal. And if the state could do them this dirty, what hope is there for teachers, local government workers, secretariat cleaners, and the army of underpaid civil servants?
The retirees didn’t break the laws. They enforced them. They didn’t shirk duty. They endured it. Now, their tears join the long, sorrowful river of abandoned patriots.
One hopes the tearful protest of these police retirees does not go the way of other protests— powerful noise drowned by official deafness. Because beyond their drenched uniforms and trembling chants is a deeper truth: Nigeria is a graveyard of gratitude.
Let this protest mark a turning point, not just in police welfare, but in how Nigeria treats those who give their lives in its service. Because, truly, double wahala dey, not just for the dead body, but also for the country that lets its elders die in vain.

Ijaw Publishers’ Forum (IPF) in Nigeria, has urged president Bola Ahmed Tinubu to institute a probe into the financial management of the managing director of the Niger Delta development Commission (NDDC) and the entire board, alleging that NDDC had been turned to ATM machine for a few.
In a statement signed by the IPF spokesman, Comrade Ezekiel Kagbala, and made available to newsmen in Warri, Delta State, the media body further called on prominent Niger Delta leaders to prevail on the Ogbuku-led NDDC management to give stewardship of the trillions accrued to the commission over the period of his administration.
The IPF argued that the probe becomes imperative considering the “non-impactful programmes the commission is rerunning to allegedly siphon money belonging to the people of Niger Delta to their individual pockets.”
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According to the media body, “Ogbuku is not interested in lifting Niger Delta region out of poverty, underdevelopment but interested in littering the region with abandoned projects and substandard programs.”
The forum alleged that despite the “trillions accrued to the NDDC for the period of Ogbuku-led administration,” there are no rural electricity, drinkable water, good roads, bridges to connect rural communities to the urban cities, and an adequate health care centre among among Niger Delta rural and riverine communities.
The forum also lamented that there was no any riverine community being connected to the national grid, rather, “Ogbuku keeps installing low cost street solar lights that have no value in the lives of the people in a selective manner.”
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IPF insisted that NDDC “fake programs such as Project Hope, NDDC Youth Internship Scheme, Niger Delta Chambers of Commerce, Industry, Trade, Mines, and Agriculture (NDCCITMA) should be probed,” adding that they were not impactful but a “medium of syphoning the commission’s treasury.”
The media council further alleged that “Ogbuku was not working for President Bola Ahmed Tinubu’s interest in winning the Niger Delta’s support, but only interested in becoming the next governor of Bayelsa State.”
The IFP further accused Ogbuku of “doing selective empowerment of boys that were loyal to him, political leaders he feels will support him for his political ambition, his numerous girl friends and his Ayakoro community.”
The IPF warned that Tinubu’s re-election bid would suffer a terrible setback if Ogbuku-led NDDC management was not called to order.
The body added that many Niger Delta youth and communities were already angry at Tinubu for imposing Ogbuku on the throat of the commission and its people.
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