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OPINION: Powerful Lagos, Powerless Osun State

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By Lasisi Olagunju

If I were a politician, my devotion hours would be to the courts instead of pouring oil on INEC and voters, deities of limited powers. If the gods complain, I would ask them where they were when ugly death was killing sinners and saints. The buck – our electoral buck – stops at the courts. That is our reality.

A list of candidates for elevation to the Supreme Court was released last week by the Federal Judicial Service Commission. Every Nigerian should be interested in every name on that list; they are the electors of our future presidents and governors and lawmakers. They will decide the price of rice and beans tomorrow. Whether salaries and pensions will be paid and drugs will be affordable for the sick are attached to tomorrow’s decisions of the Supreme Court. It is our electoral college. We should ask questions on its proposed justices. How did the nominated get on the list? What qualified them to be there? What disqualified others who are not there? Why is Lagos on the list when it has already filled its quota?

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History is replete with cases of people who went to bed free, slept too much and woke up a conquered people. Conquest used to be by the force of arms; now it is mostly through the courts. In Nigeria, the courts are the new military; they take and distribute power to politicians. To live well, escape poverty and captivity, we should take interest in our law courts and in those who sit in judgement there. How are the courts, particularly the Supreme Court, constituted? Ask questions; insist on answers.

The courts are under threats of abduction, immediate past president of the Nigerian Bar Association, Olumide Akpata, warned at the International Bar Association (IBA) conference in France last week. He described the selection process of Nigerian judges as “bizarre”. He said there was “a deliberate attempt” by the Nigerian political class “to capture the judiciary.” He added that they are “achieving results.” He painted the picture of a helpless nation. I agree with him.

FROM THE AUTHOR: OPINION: Helen Paul And Other Bastardy Stories

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There are 22 jurists on the nomination list released last week, but like in Animal Farm, the chosen are not equally favoured. The big men of power who drew the list put ‘priority’ in front of some; they stamped ‘reserve’ in front of others. What was the criterion (or were the criteria) for giving some priority over the others? Seniority? The seniority list in the Court of Appeal is publicly available on the court’s website; the nominations mock it, particularly for the South-West. Check the nomination list. Crosscheck it with the seniority list of justices of the Court of Appeal. In all the other five zones, seniority appears to have counted in arriving at the recommendations. But, in the South-West, it is a no. So, what was the goal of the appointers? And this is where I am going. I plead that you follow me.

I am from Osun State and I am interested in how it is affected by that list. There are two nominees from the South-West; one was chosen from Lagos and one from Osun State. The one from Lagos has a crown of ‘priority’ placed on it; the gentleman from Osun State is put on the reserve bench. The truth is: Lagos has no slot to fill; it already has Justice Kudirat Kekere Ekun as the number two of the Supreme Court. The slot is ordinarily for Osun State to fill and there is a history to that claim. Justice Emmanuel Ayoola, JSC, was the last candidate from Osun State on the Supreme Court bench. Ayoola retired at age 70 in October 2003. He was 90 last month. In simple arithmetic, for the past 20 years, Osun State has not been represented in the apex court – the result of a deliberate act of misallocation. And I will explain.

Listen. How many justices are supposed to be on the Supreme Court? The court itself answers that question on its website: “The Supreme Court of Nigeria consists of the Chief Justice of Nigeria and such number of Justices of the Supreme Court, not exceeding twenty-one, as may be prescribed by an Act of the National Assembly. Presently, the Supreme Court is made up of the Chief Justice and nine (9) other Justices.” A CJN plus 21 justices cannot go round all the 37 states of Nigeria at the same time. When eight masquerades are on the line and there are six bean cakes, the system has a way to get every ancestral costume round the basket of cakes. There is always a way. For the Supreme Court slots to go round, the states are paired or combined in twos and threes and allotted slots which rotate between or among them. Ekiti and Osun states are a pair here.

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Justice Olufunlola Oyelola Adekeye got on the Supreme Court bench representing Ekiti State in March 2009. She retired from the Supreme Court in November 2012. Her exit created a vacancy that should, by right, be filled by Osun State. But smart Lagos, which already had Bode Rhodes Vivour occupying its own slot, got up in July 2013, did a fast one and took what should go to Osun State. It happened and there was no protest from Osun State. You wonder why? It was because Osun State of that era was a colony of Lagos. What happened was a case of olówó gbà’yàwó òle (the rich snatched the fool’s wife). They do that very often. Instead of Osun State’s Justice Jimi Bada of the Court of Appeal moving up to his rightful place at the top, Lagos snatched the slot for its Kudirat Motomori Olatokunbo Kekere-Ekun. The Centre of Excellence then had two slots while Osun State had zero. It is because of ‘Gbajue’ steps like this that the hinterland people like me (àwa ará òkè) always salute Lagos as Eko Ile Ogbon (Eko, home of wisdom).

The wisdom of Lagos here means craftiness and determination. It gets anything it wants because it is Lagos. If you don’t have money, everything you have amounts to nothing – including your wisdom. Lagos is rich both in means and guile – and that combination is lethal. Osun’s strength is more in needless crises and in acquiescence to rape of all kinds.

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The retirement of Justice Bode Rhodes Vivour in 2021 should ordinarily reset justice for Osun State at the Supreme Court. But no; it does not appear this will happen. Instead of returning the snatched slot to Osun State after Rhodes-Vivour, Lagos is now positioned to grab it as an addition to Kekere-Ekun. The Federal Judicial Service Commission headed by the Chief Justice of Nigeria last week nominated Hon. Justice Adewale Abiru from Lagos State as South-West’s ‘priority’ nominee to join Kekere-Ekun who is already representing Lagos. Check the seniority list of the Court of Appeal where all the candidates were drawn from, Abiru has seniors in the South-West; two of them from Osun State. One of the two from Osun is, in fact, the number two in that court -Justice Jimi Olukayode Bada; another is number 15, Justice Tunde Awotoye. The favoured Lagos man, Abiru, is number 22 – far behind those two. They ignored numbers 2 and 15 and went for number 22 – because he is from Lagos. Even if, for whatever reasons, those two seniors refuse to move up and the choice of the commission is Osun State’s Justice Olubunmi Oyewole (number 32), should he be made to be a ‘reserve’ candidate as the commission has done given the fact that the slot is for Osun State to fill?

FROM THE AUTHOR: OPINION: The Certificate Elephant In Abuja

In all these, we’ve seen how untrue our laws are that Nigerian states are equal. There is no equality of states in Nigeria; there are 22 Supreme Court seats for 37 states, Lagos alone takes two. Why is Lagos investing its men in the courts, particularly the Supreme Court? Lagos may be plain-speaking but it is never plain-dealing; it cheats, and it does it without consequences. I call Lagos the Napoleon of the West; it fights for other Pigs by cheating them. When an elder plays a game of ayò with a younger person, he must win, whatever it takes. Kí ni wón nfi àgbà se? What is the usefulness of age if you cannot deploy it to cheat children? That is the political and moral compass of the political entity called Lagos. If you like, disagree with this and flaunt Osun as the elder because it is the ‘cradle’, the ‘beginning’. But, know this: in Yorubaland, the rich is the elder – Olówó l’àgbà. Anyone with loads of years without money exists to be ignored, cheated and exploited.

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I suspect the courts are being eyed by interests because with their gavel, judges confer privileges, advantages and freedoms. They also oppress and subjugate. Check how the original owners of lands in the United States lost their rights over their lands and were converted into tenants. Read Lindsay Robertson’s ‘Conquest by Law’ (2005), how the American Supreme Court awarded “all discovered lands” to European “sovereigns” and gave “occupancy rights” to the original owners. How did it happen? Would it have happened if the judges were not of European origin? The Nigerian people have their feet firmly on that route. Their own conquest by law will be complete and completed soon unless they cap their sleeping hours.

A whole country can be helpless. Nigeria is. My dictionary says ‘helplessness’ means “weak or dependent: a helpless invalid deprived of strength or power; powerless; incapacitated.” A whole people can be helpless, especially if they choose to. The 1823 American case referenced above, Johnson v M’Intosh, gave birth to the Discovery Doctrine which, if applied here, would bequeath River Niger and all its lands to Mungo Park and his descendants. Fortunately, our politicians and the judges have not thought of importing it into our laws complete with affidavits averring that they are heirs to Mungo Park’s estate. They may still do it, once they are through with the construction of the courts in the image of their desires.

FROM THE AUTHOR: OPINION: King Obasa Of Lagos

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The Supreme Court should be the afflicted’s locus amoenus, a pleasant place of refuge, safety and comfort. But how do we tell the story of a court built of blocks of injustice? That is what I see in those who have enough taking from those who have none right inside the temples of justice. Our ancestors had neither good names nor prayers for warlords who pull straws from their neighbours’ roof so that theirs would stop leaking. The current flood from the rains will wash away the house of justice if the owners look on. It is almost a week since that Supreme Court list was out, I have not heard a whimper of protest from those holding the short end of the stick. Osun’s forbearance is legendary. But is it not stupidity to stay in queue when the other party wants everything? Lagos that has Surulere (patience is profitable) has never believed in waiting for its turn.

“He that oppresseth the poor to increase his riches, and he that giveth to the rich, shall surely come to want” (Proverbs 22:16). Enablers of iniquity have not read that verse in their Bible. They have also not read Romans 12:19. – “Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil. Cling to what is good.” To those who are Muslims and who excuse evil for reasons of class, creed and ethnicity; to them that teach or plead or enforce acquiescence as evil multiplies itself, I commend the words of the Prophet as reported by Abu Sa’id al-Khudri: The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Whoever among you sees evil, let him change it with his hand. If he cannot do so, then with his tongue. If he cannot do so, then with his heart, which is the weakest level of faith” (See Sahih Muslim, 49).

Evil will grow and flourish if it is manured with helpless acceptance. And that will be the death of Nigeria, its democracy and our freedoms. Khalil Gibran (1883-1931) was a Lebanese-American writer, poet and visual artist. He warned us never to refuse anything by accepting it; he said we should never nurse half hopes and fight half battles. He wrote many powerful lines, the most engaging are in his book, ‘The Prophet’ with the avant-garde poem ‘Do Not Love Half Lovers’. I reproduce it here: “Do not live half a life/and do not die a half death/ If you choose silence, then be silent/When you speak, do so until you are finished/If you accept, then express it bluntly/Do not mask it./If you refuse, then be clear about it/for an ambiguous refusal is but a weak acceptance./Do not accept half a solution/Do not believe half-truths/Do not dream half a dream/Do not fantasize about half hopes/ Half the way will get you nowhere/You are a whole that exists to live a life/not half a life.”

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I pray we listen – and loudly refuse to choose silence.

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I’ll Support Trump To Fight Terrorism In Nigeria If… – Wike

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The Minister of the Federal Capital Territory, Nyesom Wike, has said that he would support US President Donald Trump if he provides technology to combat terrorism in Nigeria.

Wike stated this on Monday while responding to questions in an interview on Politics Today, a programme on Channels Television monitored by DAILY POST.

His comment comes in the wake of the Christian genocide allegation in Nigeria made by Trump.

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It will be recalled that Trump recently designated Nigeria as a “Country of Particular Concern” over the same allegation.

READ ALSO:Trump To Receive Full Menu Of Options To Stop Nigeria Genocide – US Rep, Moore

The US President also said that he had asked the Defence Department to prepare for possible military action in Nigeria if the Nigerian government “continues to allow the killing of Christians”.

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Responding, Wike said, “It is not enough for me to capitalise that people are dying in Plateau, Benue and other places.

I have said that I will support Trump in providing and supporting Nigeria with technology in the fight against terrorism. I will also support any country that wants to proffer solutions in tackling terrorism in Nigeria.”

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OPINION: Trump’s Wrath Of Oedipus

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By Lasisi Olagunju

Mr Donald Trump and his Generals are buckling their armour to wipe out terrorists who kill Christians in Nigeria. “I am hereby instructing our Department of War to prepare for possible action. If we attack, it will be fast, vicious, and sweet…” the American president tweeted yesterday. Nigerians who heard Trump probably wondered where he is going to start from. People abducting people, people killing people are everywhere in Nigeria: North-East, North-West, North-Central, the South – everywhere. The forests are deeply infested; the cities have them thick behind seedy walls. How do you kill terrorists in a terror territory without killing everyone?

I risk this question: Who is the real killer here?

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What is killing Nigerian Christians, indeed, what is killing Nigerians of all faiths, is not just religion or religionists. The true assassin is the Nigerian structure; an abnormality sculpted with the cold chisel of Mr. Trump’s America and its complicit allies. As Tacitus once wrote of Rome, “They make a desert and call it peace.” Nigeria is a malformed republic calcified by those who pretend to defend it. The Nigerian structure empowers extremism and fetters the law. It enjoys the backing of the West.

Now, Trump says he is coming. Some saviours come to compound calamities. In Ola Rotimi’s ‘The Gods Are Not to Blame’, the Nigerian adaptation of Sophocles’ Oedipus Rex, Odewale is the celebrated liberator who becomes king. There is Baba Fakunle, the old, blind diviner of Kutuje. When the king, Odewale (the Oedipus figure), summons the seer to help identify the cause of the kingdom’s troubles, Baba Fakunle immediately sees the king himself as the source of the curse afflicting the land: “You are the murderer you seek”, the blind tells the king. He proceeds to even call him “bed sharer.” But the hot-tempered king thinks the prophet subversive, a coupist.

Tiresias in Sophocles’ Oedipus Rex, like Ola Rotimi’s Baba, is the blind who perceives what the sighted king cannot see. The blind reveals that the sickness of the city flows from King Oedipus himself. He is the murderer. Oedipus, who vows to cleanse Thebes, is the source of the plague and “pollution” of Thebes. Today’s world has Oedipuses; it has no Tiresias. The truth bearer exists neither in America and its allies nor in their viceroys, defenders of peace who switch off rights in search of freedom.

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MORE FROM THE AUTHOR:OPINION: Saluting Our Permanent Patriarchs

Donald Trump described Nigeria as “a disgraced country.” It is surprising that Nigeria has had no word to reply to that insult. His threats are directed at the bad children in the forests of the north. There is not a whimper from the ACF and the Northern Elders Forum. Where is their usual courage? Where is the Federal Government? If I would be cynical, I wouid ask: Why not invoke our efficient Cybercrime Act to deal with this? In case the government missed the assault, it is there in Trump’s tweet on Truth Social:

“If the Nigerian Government continues to allow the killing of Christians, the U.S.A. will immediately stop all aid and assistance to Nigeria, and may very well go into that now disgraced country, ‘guns-a-blazing,’ to completely wipe out the Islamic Terrorists who are committing these horrible atrocities. I am hereby instructing our Department of War to prepare for possible action. If we attack, it will be fast, vicious, and sweet, just like the terrorist thugs attack our CHERISHED Christians! WARNING: THE NIGERIAN GOVERNMENT BETTER MOVE FAST!”

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America’s Secretary of War, Pete Hegseth, with a “Yes sir” replied Trump with ‘automatic alacrity’. He said his boots were “preparing for action” on the soil of Nigeria. He posted on X:

“Yes sir. The killing of innocent Christians in Nigeria — and anywhere — must end immediately. The Department of War is preparing for action. Either the Nigerian Government protects Christians, or we will kill the Islamic Terrorists who are committing these horrible atrocities.”

Greek historian and Athenian General, Thucydides, underlined the causes of war: power, fear, and ambition. He warned that “the strong do what they can and the weak suffer what they must.” Secretary Pete Hegseth’s words are a salute, and a promise of death wrapped in benevolence. He and his boss spoke as relievers of the besieged of Nigeria. We thank them for their interest. But where are they going to start from?

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MORE FROM THE AUTHOR:OPINION: ‘Federal Highways of Horror’

“They can start from anywhere,” a voice replied me.

“Where is anywhere?”

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It is cool to read Trump’s promise of reprieve; we’ve seen too much not to embrace any messiah who comes around. Too many have died with their blood calling for vengeance. But this Trump rain, if it ever falls, won’t fall on one roof. Oedipus comes into Thebes, kills their terror and for that is made king. Years later, the saviour’s coming becomes bad, mass death.

I read online many who are happy that Bola Tinubu’s government is facing fire from America. Some of these are even from the Muslim North. Ancient Romans would see this and intone: “Amicus meus, inimicus inimici mei” (my friend, the enemy of my enemy). Mathematical sociologists would dust up Frank Harary’s formalisation of the Balance Theory; they would trace their signed graphs, and point to Fritz Heider’s insight that a pair of friends with a common enemy forms a balanced triangle: A friend of my friend is my friend (+ × + × + = +). A friend of my enemy is my enemy (+ × – × – = +). An enemy of my enemy is my friend (– × – × + = +). Politics!

It is strange that a government that has conquered everyone is now being conquered from a strange angle. “History shows that there are no invincible armies and never have been” (Josef Stalin).

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MORE FROM THE AUTHOR:OPINION: Ofala: Glo And An Invite From Agbogidi

I would have joined in the celebrations to welcome Trump but for the fact that history shows me the strong disguising ambition with the language of virtue; I hear the powerful invoking justice and faith while pursuing dominance. If I asked the Greek to use human history and experience to analyse Mr. Trump’s threat of a war to end all terrorist wars in Nigeria, Thucydides would likely have viewed Trump’s threat with cold, unsentimental realism. To him, the tough-talk would not be an act of moral outrage but a performance of power. He would see in Trump’s posture not compassion for the Nigerian victim of terror; the historian would see the timeless logic of empire: using other people’s tragedy to affirm strength and moral superiority.

As Thucydides might have put it, “War is not so much a matter of right as of necessity.” From history to literature, we find that those who claim to fight for justice are often merely fighting for influence. In the eyes of experience, America’s preparation “for action” would be less about saving faith, limbs and lives; it will be more about staging yet another play in the endless drama of power.

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So, I ask: Is the noise from the US truly targetted at the Nigerian Wall of Jericho? We wait to see.

We are a complicated country with complex problems. If Trump kills all today’s terrorists tomorrow, how about the next generation of killers that will come out the day after? The hatchery is not tired of making them.

So, where is the way? Donald Trump’s message of war? It cannot be the way. One thing is certain, this crisis and the response to it echo a tragic pattern: leaders are chasing false targets; messiahs will end up as wrathful Oedipuses whose presence will poison the land. These healers, they will spread plague.

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OPINION: Saluting Our Permanent Patriarchs

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By Lasisi Olagunju

Respect old age. A “strictly by invitation” conclave of Yoruba cardinals sat for two days last week, not in the traditional capital, Ibadan, but in aged Akure, Ondo State. They took the masquerade to the eastern ancestral grove and had it costumed there. If your masquerade was not there, it is because your buttocks were deemed too small for the gilded stools there. And by not being there, you just missed balls of àkàrà made specially in frying pans of honey. The cardinals sat and chose for the whole race and decreed that “we must speak with one voice.” Their Holinesses danced to African pop singer, Angélique Kidjo’s ‘Agolo’ in their own sacred way and ordered that the waist-beads of their Olajumoke must remain where it is. Who are we to say the mouth of the elder stinks? That is the judgment of age, the decree from the ancestors’ gavel. Coourt!

It is an African thing. Of what use is age if you can’t use it to dominate the youth? Àgbà kò níí tán l’órí ilè is a daily prayer in Yoruba land. It simply means “may elders not be extinct in our land.” What the Akure papacy wants is already being done in other parts of Africa. The results have been phenomenal. I am moving from Cameroon to Côte d’Ivoire, then Tanzania, and, then other places where age is prized far higher than rubies.

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They say wisdom comes with age. If that is true, no matter how “disgraced” Donald Trump says we are, East and West, Nigeria has pearls of ancestral wisdom. To our immediate East, we have Paul Biya of Cameroon; a little far west, there is Alassane Ouattara of Côte d’Ivoire. They are the current champions. Our immediate western neighbour, Benin Republic, has just banned the main opposition candidate and his party from the next presidential poll. These and many more enjoy the nod of the lords who created these countries.

I have ‘data’ people, young persons around me. They flirt into my fort and speak grammar and literature. First, they talk “gerontocracy”; then I hear “heart-cutting paradox” of Africa being the world’s youngest continent by median age, “yet it is being governed by some of the oldest leaders on earth.” Talk is cheap. What do they know? What an elder sees while seated, a child in space can’t see.

Indeed, Africa, this moment, has the wisest gathering of aged priests of power ever assembled.

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In the North, there sits Abdelmadjid Tebboune of Algeria (80), Abdel Fattah el-Sisi of Egypt (71), and Kais Saied of Tunisia (67 — just under seventy, but invested with self-made powers broad enough to last him till eternity).

In West Africa, the procession of patriarchs includes Bola Ahmed Tinubu of Nigeria (73), Joseph Boakai of Liberia (80), and Alassane Ouattara of Côte d’Ivoire (83). Nana Addo Dankwa Akufo-Addo of Ghana, now 81, bowed out, leaving the stage in January 2025 for his old rival, John Dramani Mahama, 66, to steer the ship once again.

In Central Africa, Mother Africa is still blessed with the grandest of elders: Paul Biya of Cameroon (92), Teodoro Obiang Nguema Mbasogo of Equatorial Guinea (83), and Denis Sassou-Nguesso of the Republic of the Congo (81).

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In Eastern and Southern Africa, the grey reign continues: Yoweri Museveni of Uganda (81), Isaias Afwerki of Eritrea (79), Emmerson Mnangagwa of Zimbabwe (83), and Cyril Ramaphosa of South Africa (73). Hage Geingob of Namibia passed away on 4 February 2024 at the age of 82. He was succeeded by 84-year-old Nangolo Mbumba, who served until the March 2025 election that brought Netumbo Nandi-Ndaitwah, 73, to power — the country’s first female president.

Farther east, Djibouti’s parliament has just erased the age barrier that once capped presidential ambition, clearing the path for 77-year-old Ismaïl Omar Guelleh to seek a sixth term in 2026. And on the Ethiopian plateau, President Taye Atske Selassie will turn 70 next year.

We respect and value age; that is why Africa remains forever at the top. We are the continent where wisdom and endurance sit enthroned in power.

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President Alassane Ouattara of Côte d’Ivoire is 83. He has just clinched a fourth term with the ease of a man ordering breakfast. Cast your gaze eastward to Cameroon, 92-year-old Paul Biya is there. BBC last week described him as “the leader who never loses.” He has kindly agreed to remain in office after only 43 years of national service – or should I simply call his reign ‘uninterrupted power supply’? Forty-three years in some democracies would be called eternity; here in Africa, from the Mediterranean to the Cape of Good Hope, it is continuity.

Nigeria has so much to learn especially from Cameroon where grey hair rules completely and totally. Cameroon has a council of elders whose word is law. I searched the World Wide Web, asking the oracle for the secret of that country’s success. It is the bent gait of the leaders and the age of their ideas. It is difficult to believe, but it is true, the elders list is real: To President Biya’s right is the President of the Constitutional Council, Clément Atangana; he is 84 years old. Atangana it was who oversaw the recent election and announced the results that are being celebrated with stones and bullets in the streets of the country. There is also René Claude Meka, the 86-year-old Chief of Defence Staff. He guards the guards in the name of democracy. The president of the senate is Marcel Niat Njifenji, 91 years old. With Cavayé Yéguié Djibril, the 85-year-old Speaker of the National Assembly, Njifenji sees that laws are made for the good governance of the republic. They make laws, and when they finish minting the laws, they pass them to 83-year-old Laurent Esso, the indefatigable Minister of Justice. He executes the law and its convicts. The job of this council of elders is to keep the grandfather in power and tell the young to wait for their time.

MORE FROM THE AUTHOR:OPINION: Escaping From Nigeria

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We have done well with democracy in Africa. It is no longer about freedom and welfare, and good living and life more abundant. It is about endurance – like dull, painful sex.

Latecomer Nigeria does not (yet) have its own official elders council as Cameroon. It should quietly be taking notes; that is what the wise do. We should envy Cameroon; Cameroon deserves our envy.

In Bénin, the constitutional court on 27 October, 2025, ruled to exclude the principal opposition party, Les Démocrates, from participating in the upcoming 2026 presidential election. The coast is clear for democracy in that country and for the incumbent. In East Africa, Tanzania’s presidential election was held on Wednesday last week. But the gods of polls had cracked the palm kernel of victory for the incumbent before the election day. President Samia Suluhu Hassan stood (and stands) on terra firma. She won before winning. Her opponents, candidates of the two primary opposition parties, were removed from the ballot by the gods of democracy. Their supporters are outside, burning tyres and getting buried.

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Nigeria will do better than Benin and Tanzania. If those ones had appreciated better intelligence, they would not run into the quicksand of protests harrying their hills. Instead of shutting the gate against opponents and running against themselves, how about those opposition candidates simply defecting into the ruling party? If you check the physics of politics, you will understand why politicians are ferromagnetic beings; they respond to the magnet of money and power. In Nigeria, nobody will be disqualified in the next elections. The magnet in the ruling party sucks them into the vortex of power, and that ends it. Never mind what an Abuja court said on defection last Friday. The defected should forfeit their seats. Who does that? The higher courts will correct the abnormal orders.

Yoruba ancestors are great scientists. There is this Yoruba spell that pulls whoever it wants into its bossom:

Gerere,

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Àwọ̀n maa wo won bo,

Gerere…

(Swiftly/ Net, drag them here/ Swiftly).

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People of depth who massed in Akure last week know how this magnetic net is woven. It works in Yoruba’s Lagos – it is working in Nigeria. The Tanzanian lady should have come to learn here.

MORE FROM THE AUTHOR:OPINION Generals, Marabouts And Boko Haram

I read online about children of protest dreaming of Tanzania in Nigeria. No. It won’t happen. Where is the main opposition party, the PDP? By the time we reach 2027, no opposition contraption will be well enough to stagger out of the ICU. After that feat, we will move to the next. What is next? Third term?

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‘Third term’ is scandalous; we don’t want that chain for the neck of our Olajumoke. The respectable career goal is to be so good as to be begged to become king.

Let the children of anger keep punching their tired tabs and overused phones. Someone told me that when they finally look up from those chinko phones and ask, “Who’s that old man on the ballot again?” the answer will definitely be: “The same man you voted for when you were in primary school.”

Africa is proof that democracy is tired of term limits. The British blessed us with permanent secretaries; why not bless ourselves with permanent councils of elders complete with a permanent presidency. Imagine the elegance in that alliteration: “permanent presidency.” Pulsating.

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Even in America where we copied this democracy nonsense, they are already building a throne for their king and sewing very regal royal robes. They have a king.

I read Thomas E. Cronin’s ‘On the Origins and Invention of the Presidency’ and laughed at the folly in the wisdom of the past. Cronin, by “presidency” meant American presidency.” He wrote: “In 1787 fifty-five of America’s best educated and most experienced men assembled in Philadelphia. Their average age was 42, most were lawyers or businessmen. Two-thirds had served in the Congress at one time or another; nearly twenty had served in the Continental army. Seven had been governors in their states. It was a convention of the well-bred, well-fed, well-read and well-wed.” These were the people, the 55 wise men who invented America’s presidential democracy, the one we copied like that poor student who Rank-xeroxed his mate’s exam script, name, matric number, all.

The mandate of the American wise men, according to Cronin, was “to devise an executive office that would also be effective and safe; strong enough to command respect, to help maintain order, to help conduct effective diplomatic affairs, to provide for more efficient administration, yet not so strong as to threaten civil liberties, or in any way aggrandize power contrary to the welfare of the general public.” They did what they had to do and for 229 years, they thought they got it right. They were wrong. Trump, holding Muhammadu Buhari’s toothpick, is at this moment, laughing at their wisdom.

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A permanent presidency – a king – is being considered by those around America’s Trump. Or where were you last week when former White House chief strategist, Stephen Bannon, told The Economist that President Donald Trump would serve a third term? Stephen Bannon described a third term for Trump as essential to the nation’s future, a “vehicle of divine providence”, an “instrument of divine will” and “the will of the American people.” We were very unfair to President Olusegun Obasanjo, a successful third term for him would have been a valuable part of contemporary America’s literature review.

MORE FROM THE AUTHOR:OPINION: ‘Federal Highways of Horror’

This is the age of the aged. We should tell William Shakespeare that he lied; that the poet lied in his claim that “All the world’s a stage,

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And all the men and women merely players;

They have their exits and their entrances;

And one man in his time plays many parts,…”

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Shakespeare says the drama of life always comes to an end for actors and for spectators. It is not so in Africa. Go to Togo, don’t they have Faure Gnassingbé there after Gnassingbé Eyadéma? Gnassingbé served as the president of Togo from 1967 until his death in 2005. Gnassingbé Eyadéma’s son, Faure, filled what would have been a gap immediately and has led Togo since then. What else is the meaning of immortality?

Nigeria can improve on this. One man can be president; his son governor; his brother minister; his grandchildren commissioners.

The president can even combine all those posts and positions if he wants. It will be answered prayers.

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This is a satire, but sometimes words fail the satirist and his satire. Satire itself is a dangerous thing because sometimes it stops being seen for what it is. But on this, I double down and hiss on reason and good judgment. This is the age of wisdom, I cling to the tail of the elephant of the aged, he alone can take us up the mountain before us.

In ‘As You Like It’, Shakespeare’s Jaques delivers the locus classicus on the seven ages of man. Life, Shakespeare’s character says, unfolds in seven acts; he calls them “ages”. First comes the helpless infant, “mewling and puking” and crying in a nurse’s arms; then the reluctant schoolboy, weeping and creeping to class with a shining face. Next, the lover, scribbling and sighing over verses, love poems, to his beloved; followed by the fiery soldier, proud, quick to quarrel, chasing fleeting glory: “A soldier, / Full of strange oaths, and bearded like the pard, / Jealous in honour, sudden and quick in quarrel, / Seeking the bubble reputation /Even in the cannon’s mouth.” Then appears the wise judge, full of proverbs and dignity, his form rounded by comfort. Then age steals in, turning him into a thin, slippered old man, his once-bold voice now trembling and shrill. At last, the curtain falls on all, a return to infancy, “second childishness” and forgetfulness, bereft of sight, sound, taste, and self:

“Last scene of all,

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That ends this strange eventful history,

Is second childishness and mere oblivion;

Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.”

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For all enemies of age, I render, in modern English, the last stage in the passage above, Act II, Scene VII:

“The final stage of life

that ends this strange and eventful journey

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is a return to childishness and complete forgetfulness;

without teeth, without eyes, without taste, without anything at all.”

The Shakespearean last stage is the age of nothing and nothingness. That is the age of our leaders. In nothing, nothing is bad. We love our own old age, we want it as long as it is Idi Bebere, the voluptuous, supple waist of Olajumoke.

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