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Wande Abimbola @91: How An Ábíkú Decided To Live (1) [OPINION]

Tunde Odesola
At 14, Ogunwande left his father’s house for the clinic of a renowned olóòlà, the penis stylist in Akeetan, his Oyo hometown, and declared his mission to have the foreskin of his manhood surgically removed. “Mo fe da’ko,” he told the baba of his intention to be circumcised.
The baba shot him a knowing look, fetched his surgical tools and intoned some words to himself. As directed, a bare Ogunwande lay spread-eagled, wrapping his arms around a giant gourd that passes for a surgical table while the olóòlà set to work. With a dexterity that belonged to the ages, the olóòlà peeled off the foreskin as though he was unwrapping a candy.
Blood gushed, pain panged but Ogunwande did not flinch. His face was deadpan, like still water at night. He got up, put on his clothes and headed back home as if he had only visited a tailor who had taken his measurements for an agbádá. He walked with the swagger of a youngster returning home from watching Alapinni, the father of all the egúngún (masqueraders) in Oyo.
Every why has a reason, says William Shakespeare. A newborn should be circumcised at birth or within the first few days of life if the parents believe in religious or traditional beliefs. Why then was Ogunwande, begotten by religious and traditional parents, not circumcised at birth? Why was it his call to decide when to be circumcised? Why did he not wince or cry when he was circumcised?
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Well, Ogunwande was born an àbíkú. His mother, Sangodayo Awele, had knelt four separate times before the midwife, bearing four children, one after the other, but she lost each at infancy. However, Ogunwande’s parents already had two children, Ogunyoyin and Ogundiya, before abiku visited them four times in succession.
An article, “Grief and Bereavement in Fathers After the Death of a Child: A Systematic Review,” published in April 2021 by the American Academy of Pediatrics says fathers and mothers react to the loss of a child differently. The article written by Michael J. McNeil and four others, emphasises that, “Fathers often avoided discussing their grief with others, returned to work earlier, and used goal-oriented tasks as coping strategies. Intense grief reactions and posttraumatic psychological sequelae diminished over time in mothers yet persisted in fathers.”
But another article, “Bereavement Experiences After the Death of a Child,” written by Grace H. Christ, et al, and published by the world’s largest medical library – the National Library of Medicine – owned by the US government, says, “Women typically grieve more intensely and for longer periods of time than do their spouses.”
The loss of her four babies scorched the heart of Sangodayo like the leaping tongues of fire crackling dry twigs. Because it was a period when husbands were lords, Sangodayo knelt before her husband, Iroko Abimbola, and pleaded that they both go to Babalawo Ajao in Ahoro Iseke, Oyo, to protect the newborn against returning to the netherworld.
When mother and father got to Oluwo Ajao’s place, the priest gave them his object of divination to say their hearts’ desires to. The parents did not divulge what brought them to the babalawo but after speaking to the object of divination, and Ajao consulted Ifa, ‘Eji Ogbe’ (good omen) was the revelation the babalawo got, and he said in Yoruba, “Sangodayo, you’re pregnant. You do not want the baby to die like the others that died before it.”
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Shocked, Sangodayo confirmed she was pregnant even as her husband recalled the loss of their four babies. “This baby will live,” Oluwo Ajao predicted, adding, “If you will obey these three taboos.” “What are they,” Sangodayo asked eagerly; “We will do them,” Iroko assured.
The babalawo cleared his throat, “One, the child must never be beaten. Two, he must not have tribal marks. Three, he must not be circumcised unless he willingly volunteers to do so himself.” “We shall adhere strictly to the taboos,” the husband reassured the babalawo. And the couple departed.
After some moons, the abiku crept up from the underworld realm of ageless wandering and knocked on the door of life, hoping to make father and mother cry a river the fifth time. Little did it know that a trap had been set for the whale in the depth of the deep so that no one would wail no more.
Iroko and Sangodayo welcomed their bittersweet baby with hope and trepidation. They named him Ogunwande, which means ‘Ogun has come to dwell with me’, in recognition of the family’s ultimate belief in the Ogun godhead.
Ogunwande was never beaten, circumcised or given tribal marks. And he lived as predicted by Oluwo Ajao. Iroko consecrated his son to the gods. So, Ogunwande learnt Ifa, ijala, and the worshipping of Ogun, Sango, eegun etc, knowing the panegyrics of various deities. He also learned farming and hunting as a youngster in the family’s farmstead located away from their Akeetan home. The family lived on the farmstead, occasionally coming home during Ogun, Sango, and Egungun festivals.
Ogunwande said, “The farmstead was remote and threadbare when compared with the amenities in Akeetan where the family house is located. We lived more on the farmstead and occasionally came home to Akeetan. Whenever we came back home from the farmstead, we would be super excited to see even the omolanke (cart). The farmstead was considered a bush.
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“We had come home to celebrate one of the festivals, and I passed by Native Authority Town School near our house. I saw some children wearing the same uniform, playing on the field. I was surprised.”
A curious Ogunwande sauntered onto the school field and asked a student, “What are you boys and girls doing here?” The shocked student retorted, “What are we doing here? We are learning, of course!” Ogunwande got more confused, “Learning? What is learning?” The student laughed out loudly, “Ara oko (bushman), you don’t know what learning is?” “I don’t know,” Ogunwande said, crestfallen. “What’s your name?,” the impudent student asked in Yoruba. Ogunwande told him and watched as the student used a twig to write O-g-u-n-w-a-n-d-e on the ground. “That’s your name, ara oko,” the cheeky student said.
Ogunwande followed the student to his class, where he was shown what a classroom looks like. “You better tell your father that you want to school and stop chasing rats and rabbits about,” the student admonished.
School was love at first sight for ’Wande, who ran home to tell his father of his newfound desire. “I prostrated before my father; nobody in the family talked to him standing, my mother kneels to talk to him, I also prostrate to talk to my two older siblings, Ogunyoyin and Ogundiya, whom my parents had before the four abikus,” Ogunwande said. But his father wouldn’t have his son go to school. “Sukuru or what did you call it? Is that not the place where they write meaningless little things in books? Is that what you want to do with your life? Is that a job? You’re lazy! My son will never be lazy! So, you can’t go into the forest and kill buffalo, leopards and snakes? It’s writing small, small nonsense on paper that you want to be doing in your life. Is that a job? You won’t do that in my family?”
Ogunwande, subsequently, went on a hunger strike for three days, eating nothing, and he became very weak. His mother, Sangodayo, begged and wept but Iroko was unperturbed. Sangodayo, “My lord, please, remember the prediction of Baba Ajao, who said when Ogunwande comes of age, he would want to choose a peculiar job; remember, my lord, that the Baba said we should not stop him!”
But Iroko won’t budge. “So, Sangodayo ran to my father’s younger brother, Ogunyemi Ojo Olaluwoye, to come and prevail over my father,” Ogunwande recalled. Ojo spoke to my father while prostrating and pleaded my case, saying, “My lord, you’ve been to Lagos and the Second World War. Western education is the future of the world. Let Ogunwande go to school. My son, Ige, would also be joining them, too. Both of them can go together.”
“My father kept quiet for a long time after Ojo made his plea,” and he said, “You too are very lazy, Ojo! That’s why you’re supporting young boys, who should be displaying valour, to go and waste their time writing small small nonsense! It’s ok, he can go and ruin his life!”
Ogunwande survived on broth for the days his father was adamant and he became so gaunt, earning himself the nickname Olómí tóóró.
But ’Wande didn’t abandon Ifa and the worship of the deities. The knowledge of Ifa came in handy for him one day when a snake bit a student in school.
To be continued.
Email: tundeodes2003@yahoo.com
Facebook: @Tunde Odesola
X: @Tunde_Odesola
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BREAKING: Bayelsa Governor, Douye Diri Dumps PDP For APC
Bayelsa State Governor, Douye Diri, has resigned his membership of the Peoples Democratic Party, PDP.
According to Arise TV, the governor joined the ruling APC alongside 23 members of the Bayelsa State House of Assembly.
This is coming barely 24 hours after the Enugu State Governor, Peter Mbah also joined the ruling party.
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Although details of the move remain sketchy, it was gathered that the governor and the lawmakers may be preparing to officially announce their defection to the APC in the coming days.
Several federal and state lawmakers recently dumped opposition parties for the APC ahead of the 2027 general elections.
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JUST IN: PDP State Chairmen Disown Suit Seeking To Halt Convention
State Chairmen of the Peoples Democratic Party have dissociated themselves from a court action instituted to stop the party’s forthcoming national convention slated to hold in Ibadan, Oyo State, in November, saying they remain committed to the unity and progress of the PDP.
Speaking to journalists on behalf of the PDP Chairmen Forum in Abuja, the forum’s chairman and Edo State PDP chairman, Tony Aziegbemi, criticised the conduct of Austine Nwachukwu (Imo) and Amah Abraham Nnana (Abia).
Aziegbemi announced their suspension from the forum and called on the Umar Damagum-led National Working Committee to take disciplinary action against any NWC member found to be directly or indirectly connected to the court case.
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He stated, “We distance ourselves completely from the suit and the plan to use it to stop the PDP from holding its National Convention. This is not right.
“We want to state clearly that we are solidly behind the Damagum-led NWC, and we will give our full support to ensure a hitch-free convention.”
The evil plot of the APC to turn Nigeria into a one-party state will never succeed.
“We hope other organs of the party will draw inspiration from our decision. We must all stand firm and make the right choices.”
Details shortly…
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The Audacity Of Hope: Super Eagles And Our Faltering Political Class
By Israel Adebiyi
There are moments in a nation’s story when a game becomes more than a game-when the sweat on the pitch mirrors the struggle of a people, and the roars from the stands echo the collective heartbeat of a nation desperate for redemption. Such was the scene when the Super Eagles clawed their way back from the brink of elimination to secure a playoff spot in the race to the 2026 FIFA World Cup.
It wasn’t just football; it was symbolism-a parable in green and white. From the dreary days of uninspired draws, missed opportunities, and lackluster displays, the Eagles stood on the edge of national disappointment. The odds were stacked, the critics were loud, and the faith of millions trembled. Yet, when the final whistle blew in their emphatic victory over the Cheetahs of Benin Republic, something shifted-not merely in scoreline, but in spirit. It was a triumph of grit, not glamour; of will, not wealth; of belief, not bluster.
Nigeria needed that moment. In many ways, the Super Eagles’ journey mirrors the story of the country itself-a people endowed with talent, weighed down by inconsistency, often their own worst enemies, yet still capable of soaring when purpose meets passion.
Comebacks do not happen by accident. They are built on self-reflection, discipline, and a renewed sense of mission. Before the turnaround, the Eagles had looked like a team without direction. Disjointed in play and spirit, they embodied what happens when leadership loses vision and followership loses faith. But something changed-the game plan was redefined, individual brilliance gave way to teamwork, and complacency bowed to hunger.
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Therein lies the first lesson for our nation’s leadership: redemption begins with recognition of failure. It takes humility to accept that the path one treads leads nowhere. For months, Nigerians cried out for accountability and vision-not just from their footballers but from those who govern. Our leaders, like the Eagles before their awakening, must learn that no nation moves forward when its strategy is based on improvisation rather than introspection.
In that decisive match, the Eagles played not as men protecting a privilege, but as warriors defending pride. They fought like men who knew the alternative-failure-was too bitter to bear. Hunger, it turns out, is the secret engine of excellence. When comfort sets in, mediocrity follows; but when hunger burns, possibilities unfold.
That, again, is the Nigerian story. For too long, we have watched leaders bask in comfort zones while the nation groans under the weight of complacency. The hunger for transformation-the fierce desire to prove that we can rise beyond our failures-must return to our national psyche. The Super Eagles didn’t win because they had better boots or bigger names; they won because they had something to prove. And perhaps that’s the mindset we need in our public offices, our schools, our industries-men and women who are driven, not by perks of position, but by purpose.
The audacity of hope is what keeps nations alive when all else fails. When the Eagles faltered in earlier matches, Nigerians lamented but did not surrender. Hope persisted, sometimes faintly, but enough to keep the drums beating. It was hope that made millions still tune in, still believe that perhaps, just perhaps, the tide could turn.
That same hope must animate our civic and political life. Hope that the economy can recover from its staggering inflation. Hope that our schools can rise again from neglect. Hope that insecurity can yield to peace, and that leadership can once again mean service, not self-interest.
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But hope, on its own, is not magic-it must be partnered with strategy and sacrifice. The Eagles did not just hope their way into victory; they trained, they adjusted, and they fought. In the same way, our national rebirth will not happen through wishful thinking. It will require collective participation-citizens holding leaders accountable, leaders inspiring citizens with vision, and institutions working beyond selfish agendas.
Every government, like every football team, begins with a promise-to perform, to deliver, to inspire. Yet, how many administrations start strong and end in disarray, having lost both focus and the trust of the people? The Eagles’ story reminds us that it’s not how well you start, but how courageously you finish.
For our political class, the message is clear: when the people you lead lose faith in you, it is not a media problem-it is a leadership problem. The Eagles didn’t silence their critics through propaganda; they did it through performance. They let their results speak. Leadership must learn the same principle. The Nigerian people have heard enough speeches; what they crave are results-visible, tangible, life-changing results.
In the end, what happened on the field was more than a sporting victory. It was a moral sermon, a national mirror. It said to us: “You can stumble, you can fall, but you must not stay down.” It said to the struggling student, the weary civil servant, the disappointed voter-keep faith. There is always another match, another chance, another season.
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And that is the essence of nationhood. We rise, we falter, we rise again. The story of Nigeria, like that of the Super Eagles, is not one of perfection but of perseverance. We are a work in progress-a people of resilience, resilience born from countless setbacks and sustained by an unyielding belief in tomorrow.
The Super Eagles have given us more than joy; they have handed us a metaphor for redemption. They have shown that no matter how dark the first half, the game is not lost until the whistle blows. But they have also challenged us-to find in our collective life that same hunger, that same resolve, that same audacity to hope.
For Nigeria, as for her footballers, the message is timeless: the future belongs not to the loudest, but to the most persistent; not to the privileged, but to the purposeful.
If we can summon, as a people, the discipline of the comeback and the hunger of the Eagles, then perhaps one day, our national anthem will no longer sound like a prayer for what could be-but a celebration of what we have finally become.
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